My wife was adopted and raised by wonderful people. But she, her son and our daughter have had some life long health problems. We finally decided to try to make some contact with her biological family(ies) to get at least some health history information that may ease, or help us anticipate the future. One of the DNA matches is a first/second cousin, 20 years older than my wife. We have called, send letters, tried phone calls, messages on line, etc. No response. So I set about creating a family tree for the cousin trying to narrow down the search for a parent. I ran into a family tree being compiled by the cousin's DIL. So I sent a message to the DIL asking for assistance in contacting the cousin. The DIL responded that she would help, but now there is just silence. No response to anything. I figured if the cousin knows which of her relatives is the parent, she could give us health information with no trauma to any one. No need to bother the parent or stir up any unpleasantness. I was very clear that I am only seeking family health history information
In the meantime, I have compared family trees of other more distant DNA matches and I am close to locating another part of the parents' families.
When I judge the possible help for the health and treatment of the wife and kids, vs a little time by a cousin to answer some questions, it just seems really inconsiderate to ignore the contact. Is that wrong?
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