READ THE WHOLE THING BEFORE YOU HIT THE REPORT BUTTON AND CRY "POLITICAL"!!
A friend on a social networking website where I am a member wrote the following essay and posted it today. I found it so powerful---and so true---that I am compelled to share it with everyone I know. He has distilled down into about 2000 words the problems which we have in the country today and the reasons behind them. Basically, we all need to GROW UP, put on our big-girl panties or our big-boy boxers and shape up, rather than yearning for instant gratification and miracles.
Perhaps if we read this essay, take it to heart and mind, pass it on to your children and grandchildren and nieces and nephews and parents and grandparents and brothers and sisters, we can change our ways of thinking and expecting, at least a little bit?
I thought this was important enough to share.
The Infantizing of America
In last Tuesday’s elections, Republicans regained governorships of Virginia and New Jersey. My right-wing friend reliably shot off an e-mail crowing that the "love fest" for Obama was over.
My friend’s remark troubles me, because he’s right. Obama has been in office for eleven months and all the talk is about how he’s failed to fix the economic crisis. It took eight YEARS for the nation to recover from the Great Depression, yet many of Obama’s supporters have become cranky because they’re not back to flipping houses.
The outpouring of adoration when Obama was elected exalted Obama to the level of Moses coming down from the mountain. Maybe we ought to remember that when Moses came down from the mountain, he didn’t bring solutions to everyone’s problems, he brought the Law, which demanded moral strength and grown-up patience.
Today we lack both of these as we become more and more infantile. "Infantizing" is my term for a social and cultural trend I see in American society. It is a trend toward behaving like infants or very young children, and it frightens me because it has brought with it violence, bigotry, and the loss of manners and humanity. An infant behaves in certain ways:
When an infant is hungry, it screams and flails until it is fed. An infant cannot control its hunger.
If an infant breaks a priceless vase, or pulls the dog’s ears, it won’t understand why you’re angry. An infant has no sense of right or wrong.
When an infant is angry or frustrated it strikes out, with fists or rattle or anything in its grasp. An infant cannot control its temper.
An infant will taste baby food, table food, paint, medicine, or its own leavings, with equal gusto. An infant has no taste or judgment.
When an infant wants affection, it will fuss, cry, and thrash until it is picked up and cuddled. An infant needs constant attention.
For an infant, everything new is frightening or fascinating, no matter what its true value. An infant has no experience or perspective.
All of these attributes and behaviors are natural for infants; they’re SUPPOSED to be this way, and wise parents learn patience and understanding until the infant learns better. But I see the adults in our society exhibiting the behaviors of infants:
An infant cannot control its hunger. Eating disorders affect millions of men and women; we stuff ourselves with junk and gargantuan restaurant portions. Women work out at Curves and then reward themselves with a chocolate chip muffin. Boys spit and belch in public. Teenagers destroy homes during parties. Men rape when a woman refuses.
An infant has no sense of right or wrong. Rod Blagojevich is arrested on multiple corruption charges and is caught on tape trying to sell a U.S. Senate seat, but insists, "I did nothing wrong." Orlando Magic forward Rashard Lewis serves a 10-game suspension for violating the NBA's Anti-Drug Agreement and says, "I still feel I did nothing wrong." A home is robbed and the owners rush to hide valuables in a neighbor’s house so they can make a false insurance claim. Feeling guilt or shame is considered un–cool and weak.
An infant cannot control its temper. Civility and tact have become extinct. If a man feels slighted he beats the offender with a baseball bat. A hitter charges the pitcher at the slightest provocation. Motorists flip each other the bird, or sometimes use firearms. At town hall meetings, partisans scream and disrupt, rather than listening and debating. If a girl dares break up with her boyfriend, he kills her. Citizens sue each other for any reason, refusing to take responsibility for their actions.
An infant has no taste or judgment. The electronic media reduce all information to blips that don’t relate to each other. Texting, tweeting, and TV sound bites have reduced attention span to a few seconds. Reading has all but disappeared. Today’s generation is abysmally ignorant of history and culture. Mediocre performers are "legends," second-rate baseball players earn half a million dollars a season, men who spew bigotry are considered pundits, and the Real Housewives of New Jersey pull huge audiences for live "shows."
An infant needs constant attention. The media and technology have led us to expect instant love and friendship and instant solutions to complex problems. If a marriage doesn’t feel like "fun" after a week, the couple divorces. Teens buy each other gold after one date. "Reality" shows feature whiny, self-absorbed brats of all ages. Voters will elect a candidate to lower their taxes and provide unlimited government services, then vote the guy out a year later if miracles haven’t occurred.
An infant has no experience or perspective. In today’s info-media world, every event is of equal importance, and the wildest fabrications are accepted as truth. On CNN, a terrorist attack and a runaway bride are both "Breaking News." If the President burps, it goes viral on the Internet. House members Michelle Bachman (right wing) and Alan Grayson (left wing) pump out ludicrous "populist" statements and have millions of devoted followers. Horrifyingly huge numbers of Americans believe that Obama is a Muslim or that zinc cures a cold (he isn’t; it doesn’t).
We haven’t become more "Immoral" or "Evil." Rape, murder, bribery, torture, drug dealing, robbery, calumny, official misconduct, perversion, and abuse have all been part of human life as long as there have been humans. But in the best of times, there has been enlightenment, knowledge, a yearning toward humanity. Excellence has been striven for in art, music, and literature. Language has been ennobled and enriched.
We are in a position to fashion a society better than any that has gone before. Technology has given us creature comforts and the means to communicate globally. It has made possible mind-bending explorations in the arts. With information traveling across fiber optics in nanoseconds, we can create a stunning Renaissance. But instead we have become, as Time Magazine put it, a nation of busybodies and crybabies. We wallow in ego, refuse to acknowledge guilt or responsibility, throw tantrums if we don’t get our way, demand instant gratification in all things from dinner to love, hurt or kill when crossed.
Most dreadfully, we have trashed our past and our heritage. As the new generation grows up unwilling and unable to read and write, bereft of the ability to think or use information, we lose all that has made us human. We become a coast-to-coast playpen filled with squalling infants. This, of course, is what the bankers and CEOs and politicians want. Our willful ignorance and infantile behavior makes us susceptible to lies in ads and on the campaign trail. The rich and powerful want us to remain infants, to be fed and burped and tucked in, to pose no threat to greed or tyranny. Education makes grown-ups out of babies, and grown-ups can’t be easily fooled.
Self- discipline, delayed gratification, appreciation of complexity, mastery of language, are the hallmarks of adulthood and maturity. No worthwhile adult will ever lose the "child" within, and sometimes we should give in to our bodily hungers. But not all the time. If we all remain babies, there soon will be nobody to care for us.