Secrets to staying busy in retirement?

[Frederick Skelly]

Hi guys,
I didnt want to hijack Mr. Potter's thread about being 80, so I'll ask the question here.....

Im years from retirement, and conditions could certainly change. But I worry, because I've seen more than one relative retire and then decay/die by just sitting on the sofa. I understand it can be hard to motivate oneself at 70+. But I wondered if anyone has suggestions for HOW to stay engaged and active.

My relatives all knew they "should" get a hobby, a social group, etc. But they just couldnt break the sofa habit. How do you folks do it? For example, do you "force yourself" to go find new places to socialize? Do you just keep trying different types of volunteer work until you find one that suits? Etc.

Sorry if this seems like a dumb question, but Im hoping to get some experienced advice.

Respectfully,
Fred

[Jim Becker]

Frankly, I never got into the "sofa habit" thing so it wasn't something I personally had to worry about. It's a rare day I watch anything on TV other than the morning news and that's while I'm still in bed. (Professor Dr. SWMBO does watch some things on her iPad to keep her mind occupied for health reasons I'll not go into here but doesn't retire until the end of this academic year. I retired at age 60 five years ago) I'm pretty much doing things constantly at this point, but I'll admit that over the last year, I was sitting a lot more at the computer because of not having a shop available for larger projects and only having so many "home improvement" I wanted to tackle. I am a "voracious" fiction reader, but that happens at night, in bed.

I absolutely agree with staying active in some way, socially or otherwise. Regular walking, participating in activity(s) and hobbies, volunteering, working part time for mad money, travel and/or regularly visiting museums/galleries/zoos/whatever, etc., are all good ways to do that. That doesn't mean not enjoying TV/movies, etc., but schedule that stuff, rather than just becoming a snacking lump glued to the sofa and screen.

[Alan Lightstone]

For me, the lack of socialization was/is an issue. I went from talking to approximately 50 people a day in the hospital, to one during the pandemic (my wife), and I joke that there are days she doesn't want to talk to me.

I had/hobbies, which is clearly important, and was planning on a lot of travel. That was put on hold for the pandemic, but should be restarting very soon. Make it more than one hobby, as some get more difficult as you get older.

Exercise, of some sort, is important. Taking care of your health is very important. If you have a good primary care doctor see her/him. Follow their advice. Check out your heart. Take the appropriate medicines to reduce your risk of bad things happening (e.g statins, high blood pressure medicine). If you don't have a pet, get one. Lots of dogs and cats that need adoption and a good home. Nothing like the love of a good animal. After that, it's all up to your genes and not stepping in front of a bus.

[Dave Anderson NH]

I would suggest getting active both socially and in a hobby or hobbies well BEFORE you retire. That way retirement is just a continuation of your lifestyle. The other helpful thing is to get involved with things that interest you which you never had time for in the past. In effect, the "bucket list" everyone talks about. I personally volunteer at the local VA Medical Center one day a week, sit on a town committee, administer and coach American Legion 10 meter Olympic Air Rifle, and am involved in the Guild of NH Woodworkers. I fill out some of the other time with actual woodworking, yard and garden work, heavy reading, and yes, vegging out occasionally. Some small amount of wasted veg out and down time is not a sin.

[Mike Henderson]

My wife has a list of projects for me that will keep me occupied until I'm 100

But seriously, we have a fairly large property and there's always something to be repaired. Then I do woodworking and beekeeping. I also have two dogs and they have to be fed and walked twice a day. Other stuff also pops up, especially requests for help from neighbors and my wife. I don't know where the day goes sometimes.

I'm not a joiner so no advice on getting involved with organizations. But there are lots of organizations which are doing good things and need help.

Mike

[Tyler Bancroft]

Many universities offer cheap or free tuition for seniors. Never too late to learn something new! And it's pretty well-established at this point that regular, cognitively-demanding mental activity is beneficial in the aging process.

[Roger Feeley]

Hi guys,
Sorry if this seems like a dumb question, but Im hoping to get some experienced advice.

Fred, this may be one of the least dumb questions I can imagine.

My experience is unique.
— I live 40 feet from my daughter and grandkids. There’s no shortage of “Daddy do’s”
— My house has a 976 first floor with a 1300 sq ft shop below. So it’s really easy for me to wander down to the basement and make or fix something.
— I never truly identified with my various paying jobs. They were interesting, entertaining things that I did to make money. So walking away in the end involved little pain. As a friend put it, “I don’t miss the rat race but I do miss the rats.”
— my wife and I are both in decent health. We travel a bit more. We’ve been taking the grandsons on trips which is fun.

Im on the autistic spectrum so I’ve never had a circle of friends. I have my wife and family which is enough for me. I belong to the local maker space (NOVA Labs) mostly to use the big laser engravers. If I ever want to be social, I could hang out there.

[Steve Demuth]

A funny thing happened to me on the way to retirement. When I reached my early 50s, I realized that the reasons that had compelled me to work were almost entirely satisfied - we owned our home and farm in the clear, the kids' and wife's (mid-life edition) education were all payed for (an endeavor that cost our family more between age my 40 and 52 than everything we've spent on our home and farm in 40 years), and we had sufficient savings to cover the cost of 30+ years of retirement. But I kept working anyway, but looked for jobs where I could actually believe that what I was doing was a significant contribution to a bigger, valuable-to-others scheme of things. It felt good - good enough that I poured myself into it, and didn't have time to fully engage in the farm, or woodworking. Things slid and piled up. So when I did retire, at age 66 (couldn't keep up with the younger minds any longer), I had plenty to do - projects that never get done (or started), really manage the orchard and vineyard, harvest wood from the forest for woodworking, refit the shop, learn some new techniques, and time to take advantage of all the marvelous self-directed on-line learning available nowadays on just about any subject you care to indulge in. Then too, unfortunately, there was more energy needed for medical assistance for my wife, who has contracted a couple of different cancers. Finally, I could also just enjoy NOT having to interface constantly with dozens to hundreds of other people (I'm an extreme introvert - if I talk to one person per month outside of my immediate family, that's not too few, but my job was all about leading, mentoring, and directing, so very people intensive).

So, I have never been bored, but the thing is, I really derived energy from feeling part of that bigger cause, and none of the stuff I am doing now (other than the wife-care) is for anyone other than the two of us, and mostly me. So, it feels kinda empty.

So, my advice is, understand why do whatever it is that you do, and look for post-retirement options that scratch that itch, not just ones that occupy the mind and body. The is latter is good and necessary, but the thing that will keep you going is the former.

[Greg Funk]

As you get older I think quality of life is important. For me that means staying fit in order to continue to do the things I enjoy. Cycling has been a great way for me to stay in shape and socialize. I've been riding with a local group at least once a week for the past 15 years while working and semi-retired. Riding with a group of fit cyclists keeps me motivated to stay in shape. A core group of us usually travel to Europe or other interesting locations for an intensive cycling vacation every year. Great opportunity to see the sights and eat and drink ample quantities without gaining weight. Highly recommend cycling if you can find a group of like minded individuals to ride with.

[Keegan Shields]

Best way to stay busy when you retire is to get a job. 😁

But seriously, the people who retire and don’t have anything to do seem to die sooner based on my non scientific sampling of people I’ve known. Might just be me.

[Jack Frederick]

Like Alan, my difficulty upon retiring at 70 was/is the loss of all those folks I dealt with on a daily basis. Today, I work for my girls. One wife, two daughters and they keep me busy. I work out and dropped 25# over the last couple yrs. First off though is to get out of bed and get moving. I have to get things going in the am as my energy level fades as the day progresses. I am never in the shop evenings.
I recently went with a friend to help him pick up his new 15” Grizzly planer. The son was selling his fathers gear. The father in anticipation of retirement completely set up a shop, bought a lot of wood and nice tools and upon retiring sat in front of the tv smoking and drinking until he passed. A shame really.

[Maurice Mcmurry]

I met two gentlemen from the DC area on the Katy Trail the other day. They were kicking off their retirement by cycling across Missouri. No E-bikes, No hotels or B&Bs. Tough, happy guys, carrying all their camping gear, self sufficient, and smiling!

[Carroll Courtney]

Here’s my secret, myself I hope to move to Toledo Bend Lake which my place is rocks throw from water but no view. It’s what I could afford, which taxes be little cheaper and no river authority fees. I use to be on water fresh water fishing every weekend till had kids, and sports. Crappie are very good eat, which I also use go bass fishing all time. My place that I am building will be my 32’x38’ wood/ metal shop. Which I enjoy trying make projects that I visualize going into the Smithsonian. Plus having grandkids is a blessing. But if I don’t hurry they won’t be kids anymore. I talk about what I’m going to do, but I’m sure I’m not the only one that’s want woodwork and fishermen.Find something you enjoy or try something completely new that get you off couch/TV and computer. Just like you were saying I also witness others who retired and cut their life short by not doing anything

[Jim Koepke]

But I worry, because I've seen more than one relative retire and then decay/die by just sitting on the sofa.

But seriously, the people who retire and don’t have anything to do seem to die sooner based on my non scientific sampling of people I’ve known. Might just be me.

It is just you. A lot of people from my former work place retired and did little to nothing and were gone in less than a year.

At one time my plan was to work possibly until turning 65 or 70. Work was wearing me down so my decision was to retire before turning 58. My coworkers were told that no one was going to give me any more years of retirement for staying longer. At first it was a bit of a struggle financially. We have a greenhouse so we propagated plants and made things like potting benches and Adirondack chairs to sell at the local farmers market.

We have a wooded area on our property in back of the house for an enjoyable place to walk. My cat likes to go there with me.

Often there is nothing better than to putter in my shop. Sometimes it is making things, sometimes fixing things. Sometimes it is splicing a blind eye on the ends of a piece of rope for my truck. Sometimes it is tying a monkey fist knot to play with the cats.

Monkey Fist & Accesories.jpg

That is a larger monkey fist for tying to the end of a line for tossing over a limb or to a dock. It was an experiment to see how much fishing line was needed to cover the end of the splice. FYI, it took about ten feet on the left side. For the cat toy a 1/4 inch rope or smaller cord is used. For dogs a bigger knot is usually fine. A lot of these were given to people whose dogs didn't want to give them back.

There is always something to do in the shop, garden or greenhouse.

For me it was also enjoyable to go rust hunting and find old hand tools to fix up and sell for some extra income.

jtk

[Jim Becker]

As a friend put it, “I don’t miss the rat race but I do miss the rats.”

^^ This is spot on. I'm truly thankful for social media as it's very much helped me stay in touch with a number of "work" friends post retirement, just as it's done the same for relatives and childhood friends from school, etc.

I'm on the autistic spectrum so I’ve never had a circle of friends.

I also do not have a lot of local friends and with one exception those I do I met online in forums like this. One of them who recently moved to this area and also just retired (quite early as I believe he's under 60 by a few years) actually came over today to help me pull the Ethernet line through the conduit between the house and the new shop building. He's only one month into retirement and he's struggling with exactly what the OP asks about "as we speak"...what to do; how to stay busy; whether to get another job, even part time; etc. We talked about it for a bit after completing the task. I expect I'll be keeping him busy on days when he has access to their one vehicle.