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Thread: Psyche damage

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Fort Smith, Arkansas

    Psyche damage

    I wonder what the current situation and how it's being handeled will affect the psyche of today's young children. Their world suddenly upended by scary events they don't understand. Perhaps made worse by the fear they see and hear in their parents. In some cases just witnessing plain mass hysteria. I have a now preteen grandson who a few years ago was caught up in the mass hysteria reaction of a crowd at a college football about a RUMOR of an active shooter triggered by some kind of loud noise. People running, screaming and pushing others in the panic to escape affected him deeply and not in a good way. Maybe just one way this attempted cure is worse than the illness. Most will certainly carry the memory of this through their lives and I suspect many will carry emotional damage as well. IDK. Hope I'm wrong.
    My three favorite things are the Oxford comma, irony, and missed opportunities

    The problem with humanity is: we have paleolithic emotions; medieval institutions; and God-like technology

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    New Jersey
    My son's take, he is 14 for reference. Home schooling is awful, misses school, his friends and less work. Stay at home and social distancing give him the green light to spend every waking moment on his phone or computer.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Longview WA
    Blog Entries
    There was something on TV this morning about how New York (can't recall if it is statewide or just the city) has free psychological counseling call in line to help people with their anxieties and such.

    "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty."
    - Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Michael Weber View Post
    Maybe just one way this attempted cure is worse than the illness.
    You are certainly right that there is an important psycho-social component. But, at the same time, there is presently a hospital in NYC with a refrigerated semi truck in the parking lot holding dead bodies (most of whom died alone, as visitors can't be in the hospital). The state ordered 85 more trucks for the coming days. (source)

    We need to trust that the doctors, epidemiologists, virologists, and experts who believe this plan is the best plan forward. They are smart people. They know full-well that there will be significant psycho-social damage, but have decided it's a price that needs to be paid. Trust them.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    SE PA - Central Bucks County
    My feeling is despite the initial aversion to the focus on technology, especially by the kiddos, it may be a saving grace here because it's enabling many people to continue interaction with friends and family, despite being physically separate. And that includes tweens and teens which are in that point in human life where social interaction is a huge part of our world as we learn to be adults. So my advice to parents is to allow it "within reason" and even enhance it by helping them do things like have a gathering of friends or a "party" while video conferencing together. A close friend of mine ("sister from another mother") and I had a conversation about that this morning. She's an (unfortunately currently unemployed) single mom with an almost 13 yo daughter that I mentor. It's been very difficult being cooped up in their house together...they are both strong personalities and hormones are raging at the same time. Yet the young lady had a really great time last night on an online video meeting for a church group she's part really worked and improved the mood greatly. So we're encouraging doing similar with her small group of friends that she normally hangs out with so they can hang out together rather than in just one-on-one text/phone conversations. So physical isolation is really necessary, but there's no reason that anyone, young or old, needs to also be socially isolated. Use the tools we have available now to make the best of a difficult situation.

    The most expensive tool is the one you buy "cheaply" and often...

  6. #6
    I’ll tread lightly here but..

    My two cents.

    It seems unavoidable that this will impact the phyche of young people moving forward.

    I lived in nyc during 911. I watched the the towers burn to the ground from my bedroom window across the river in Brooklyn. I inhaled the ash dust and debris first thing in the morning not knowing what it was till I got to my local coffee shop and was told a plane flew into the world trade center. I remember looking up at the tv and seeing the cloud of smoke around lower Manhattan I was inhaling across the river and going “oh shit that’s what’s going on”.

    Did it impact the way I thought or preceded or conducted my life in the following years. Not even a little as I was 20 something arrogant as hell with the typical perspective of a young person “that all doesn’t include me attitude”. You know kinda like all the young folk now still going going about this like overreacting is not eh only logical option. Right now I have a neighborhood of dam kids pout play. Ok not dam skids but stupid stupid parents.

    I’ll start by stating I’m not even slightly religious. Nor am i a dooms day this or that, a gun owner, munitions hoarder or bomb shelter owner. I’m pretty left very liberal and I don’t worry about much other than making sure everyday I’m living my life as I would if it where my last.

    I’ll follow by saying that I have been thinking for a number of years now “mass shootings, climate deniers” that the righting is on the walls. Again not religious one bit but I hear the worlds in the scriptures ringing in my head, “things like plague will become increasingly prevent, greed and those in power will look good to the masses but in reality be brutal dictators, we will destroy and exauhst our natural resources blah blah blah. Civil war will erupt, world war even.

    What I’m trying to get at is the premise that we are our own worst enemy us humans. That we do ourself in with our heads in the clouds the whole while thinking everything is roses, I’m doing my part and none of it really matters as I’ll be dead and gone. We are our own worst enemy’s imop. In the name of me myself and I our own personal family units we destroy this great earth. We all think our crap don’t stink but very very few of us “myself included” do a dam thing to stop this snowball.

    Yes there are some that dedicate their lives to solutions regarding all the above mentioned topics. But general the masses me included do next to nothing. All the while we stuff our faces with the very stuff that is guarantee to take all that is great about life and this earth away. Very few think beyond themself and take any significant action. We are all responsible for our decline and the earths. It’s pathetic and sad us humans really.

    Will this change the way our young think. I sure as hell hope so. As it’s long overdue that us humans begin thinking not as me but as us. And not as the earth as ours but us as visitors and care takers. The me needs to be taken out of the very very short and imop insignificant role we each play in the course of a life when pretty much all we do is consume and self fulfill destroying the very thing we cling so tightly to. Its my opinion that “me” is what got us to mass shootings, to planes flying into towers, wars, and now pandemic to add to the list.

    I can’t help but think that maybe not in my lifetime “43” us humans will go the way of the t-Rex and honestly I think based on our behavior it’s full well what most of us deserve. Further I think we could be closer to such than any of us know.
    Last edited by Patrick Walsh; 03-26-2020 at 4:47 PM.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2019
    Gloucester, MA
    My boys are younger, eight and six, so I don't think they fully grasp what's going on. They know why they're out of school and that people are getting sick but they don't get the magnitude of what's happening so I don't know how much the pandemic it self is going to have an effect on them if any at all.

    Where it is going to effect my younger son is in his development. He's in his second year of kindergarten and still not progressing like he should be. Now he's not getting the help of the specialists in his intervention programs. We are trying our best to work with him but my wife and I are not professionals. We are very worried about him regressing from an already behind point, then what do we do? Do you hold him back and make him do a third year of kindergarten? It was hard on him the first time, not moving on with his friends. We don't want him thinking there's something wrong with him when everyone else moves on and he just stays in kindergarten. At the same time, pushing him forward to first grade is just going to put him further behind.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Hoping they’ll be fine. When I was a teen I lived in the sticks. We had a snow/ice storm that socked us in without power for 15 days. This was pre cable TV, cell phone, internet, etc. No pot, no booze. Wood for heat. Cooked in the fireplace. I made do. We played cards, chess, and other board games. We went for short walks. We took lots of naps. We stunk after two weeks without a proper shower. We were fine.
    Sharp solves all manner of problems.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Medina Ohio
    My daughters niece is a consular and she said there is an increase in kids needing help

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Lewiston, Idaho
    We have 8 grandkids from ages 34 to 7. My wife is currently in California, watching and homeschooling the 3 youngest, twin 10 yo granddaughters and their 7 yo brother, our grandson. I am at home in Idaho taking care of things here. I just got off the phone with my wife and we were discussing the youngsters. When the schools were closed, the school issued netbooks to each student loaded with their class homework. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, they video conference with their teacher and classmates for some socializing and discussion of class work. They have the capability of contacting the teacher M-F during normal classroom hours to get questions of their homework answered.

    Normally our DIL limits their time on computers to a set daily amount but that is not in effect in these times we are experiencing.

    The DIL is a clinical pharmacist working in 2 hospitals. She discusses the situation in a unstressed manner each day. Will it have an effect? Maybe. I think the effect will be very individual based on the circumstances each child experiences and the manner in which the adults around them handle the issues. Like a lot of things, I think it will be very individual.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Wayland, MA
    I remember vividly hiding under our desks to prepare for an atomic attack. I was convinced that we were in imminent danger of being incinerated. By the time I was 7 or 8 I was reading books about WWII and knew in some detail what had happened in Japan. I used to sit on the beach (of Lake Erie) watching for mushroom clouds in Cleveland, so I could run home in time to be with my Mom.

    Permanent damage? I guess that's for other to say ...

  12. #12
    Join Date
    May 2005
    SE South Dakota
    I'm a Korean War baby. Dad was career. Lived all over the USA and Europe, (6 yrs.)
    Dad went to 'Nam, we (Mom and 2 younger brothers) stayed at granpa&grammas farm and went to country school.
    He made another trip to "Nam and I was old enough to move into my Grammas house to finish my last 3 years of high school while mom and brothers
    stayed on @ Ft. Sill OK. Then dad retired (1st Sgt Big Red One)
    My draft # was 1!! Dec 4th--Ima lucky guy. Went to basic training and half way through Nixon stopped sending troops.
    I remember the A-bomb shelters and "hide" under your desk drills.
    I remember living in Westport CT where we were to "poor" to afford beef on dads army pay---we had to eat lobster, clams, crab, flounder....I liked being "poor"!
    The greatest harm to my psyche was ALWAYS leaving behind school friends! That was the hardest part for me.
    I KNOW kids are resilient as I, at one time was one.
    Looking back I have seen a lot of amazing changes in life and they will too.

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  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    West Lafayette, IN
    My kids (5 & 7) are doing just fine. A little more bickering between the two of them since were home all day together which is to be expected. They are both fine though, but we are very fortunate. My wife can basically stay at home and work and I can be with the kids all day. We have a cul-de-sac to ride scooters, shoot hoops, Frisbee, etc. And have been taking bike rides around the neighborhood while I run for exercise, went mountain biking today and a hike yesterday.
    They miss their friends but weve been reinforcing the idea of how special family is and how fortunate we are. My neighbors boy is 13 and hes a super nice kid and my kids love him, so its hard to tell them we cant play together (because his older sister insists on driving to her friends houses constantly!).
    But overall, my kids are doing fine. Were only 2 weeks into this and weve got another month at least. E learning starts next week which will help fill some time durning the day, and the weather seems to finally be turning.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Modesto, CA, USA
    Realize that the last one hundred years or so have been a very unusual time in human history. Many kids grew up never seeing a dead body and not having young friends or relatives die. My Mother born ,in1920, Said she was told as a child the ideal family had four children: two to replace the parents, one to increase the population and, one to die.
    I certainly grew up thinking it was very unusual for a child to die. I only know of one girl who got lekumenia in high school and died. No one else in my school of about 2,000 died except three by drowning.
    I would hate to see people die of drug resistant diseases and return to historically "normal" death rates.
    the native population of the new world never reurned their previous levels after being introduced to new diseases from Europe. Some tribes lost 80-90% of their members in a few seasons.
    I am not aware of any new diseases the europeans got from the new world?
    Bil lD
    Bill D.

  15. #15
    I've got a number of printed diaries and journals that I read years ago. Most were written in 17th and 18th centurys.
    There are comments like " leaving tomorrow many are dying here". Most of the time the next town was fine.

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