View Poll Results: To whom do the turtles belong?

Voters
51. You may not vote on this poll
  • They belong to Phil

    9 17.65%
  • I cannot see how they wouldn't belong to Phil

    3 5.88%
  • Those turtles won't even fully compensate Phil for being wrongly accused

    35 68.63%
  • Even if Phil did hide them (facts not in evidence), he'd deserve them for being clever

    4 7.84%
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Thread: To whom do the turtles belong?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Milwaukee, WI
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    6,449

    To whom do the turtles belong?

    Okay, so this last Christmas (actually, about the beginning of December) my wife and daughters purchased a box of delicious turtles (you know, the chocolate covered pecan/caramel clusters) for a friend. That is a fact agreed upon by ALL.

    My wife and kids claim that I hid the box of turtles out of site, so I would not be tempted to open and start eating them.

    I claim I did no such thing, knowing they were a gift. Come-on, I'm not that out of control.

    When the actual holiday arrived, the three of them called me at work to ask where the turtles were. I had no idea. They insisted I had hidden the turtles while they watched. I laughed and insisted that they just go to the cabinet where I hit them, and retrieve the turtles. They were unable to do this, so I argued that their claims of watching me "hide" the turtles didn't seem to hold much water.

    The three of them replaced the gift for the person that they were intended. But they kept harping back to the missing box of turtles.

    Since then, they have accused me of CONSUMING the turtles.

    I have, the entire time, maintained my innocence.

    Fast forward to just now, and I wanted to find a bite to eat. I opened a cabinet with some goods in it, looked all the way to the top, and low and behold, I noticed the missing box of turtles.

    So I called my wife and kids (they are off picking up some items for one of the kids) and said "These turtles are mine, right? For the number of times I've been accused of eating these turtles, I may as well commit the crime."

    The wife/kids do not agree. They seem to think they have a claim to the turtles.

    So I ask you, who gets the turtles?

    I've made this a poll so you may each vote and I can show my wife/kids how out of their minds they actually are.
    Last edited by Phil Thien; 01-20-2013 at 5:32 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Orleans, Cape Cod, Ma.
    Posts
    746
    I suppose that a study group could be formed to discuss the charges, the evidence, and the opposing claims. Of course, a test of the evidence would be required to ascertain forensically whether the turtles recently discovered are actually the turtles that were bought and tucked away in good faith. It may be that there is a conspiracy afoot to implicate the "man" of the house in some sort of selfish, evil activity or that there is a plan afoot to shed unfavorable light on the accused in exchange for some need or want yet to be revealed by the accusers ( a shopping trip for mom, a teen party hosted at the accusers' home...??). If the turtles are soft and moist, rather than hard and dry.... probably a plant. I could come by and run the taste test for ya..
    Last edited by Fred Perreault; 01-20-2013 at 6:09 PM.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Ashburn, Virginia
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    Phil,

    I think you will get more turtles in the long run if you go ahead and hand them over. And I think you will be some points ahead for all the false accusations they put on you.

    My daughter buys me a box of turtles for Christmas and my birthday. A very nice gift to get.

    PHM

  4. #4
    I'd say eat some and share the rest, then insist they buy more (to share) to compensate you for the false allegations. Everyone wins, except the turtles!


    daniel
    Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen or oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    West of Ft. Worth, TX
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    5,814
    Ok, it takes a guy from Texas to settle this....send the box to me and you won't have to fight about it!! (just don't address it to Mr and Mrs...... Jim.
    Coolmeadow Setters...Exclusively Irish! When Irish Eyes are smiling....They're usually up to something!!
    Home of Irish Setter Rescue of North Texas.
    No, I'm not an electrician. Any information I share is purely what I would do myself. If in doubt, hire an electrician!
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    At a minimum, I'm Pentatoxic...Most likely I'm a Pentaholic. There seems to be no known cure. Pentatonix, winners of The Sing Off, s3.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    SoCal
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    20,239
    Those are absolutely your turtles. You would be a harsh individual indeed to allow those useless calories to attack your loved ones. Eat them immediately.
    "What kind of chump do you take me for?"
    "First class."

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    5,582
    Ok Phil, You hid the turtles and now you found them. They are yours, but, why did you have to let them know. Now you must share them.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    Monroe, MI
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    Why did you even tell them the turtles were found??????

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Milwaukee, WI
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    Quote Originally Posted by Matt Meiser View Post
    Why did you even tell them the turtles were found??????
    LOL, because they can't convict you of murdering a man sitting in the courtroom.

    Or at least I thought they couldn't.

    What they do is amend the charges to kidnapping.

    "Oh sure, you found the turtles, because you hid the turtles, and you knew where you had hid them."

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
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    West of Ft. Worth, TX
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    So say if that were true, why didn't you eat them on the sly? I mean, you could have hid them in the shop. Or is that the first place they looked????? Jim.
    Coolmeadow Setters...Exclusively Irish! When Irish Eyes are smiling....They're usually up to something!!
    Home of Irish Setter Rescue of North Texas.
    No, I'm not an electrician. Any information I share is purely what I would do myself. If in doubt, hire an electrician!
    Member of the G0691 fan club!
    At a minimum, I'm Pentatoxic...Most likely I'm a Pentaholic. There seems to be no known cure. Pentatonix, winners of The Sing Off, s3.

  11. #11
    I say whoever has any particular turtle in their mouth could be considered it's rightful owner.

  12. #12
    Join Date
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    I am old school. Pistols at dawn....
    Shawn

    "no trees were harmed in the creation of this message, however some electrons were temporarily inconvenienced."

    "I resent having to use my brain to do your thinking"

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Livonia, Michigan
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shawn Pixley View Post
    I am old school. Pistols at dawn....
    I agree. I understand that turtles have lousy aim.

    -Tom Stenzel

  14. #14
    Quote Originally Posted by Phil Thien View Post
    "Oh sure, you found the turtles, because you hid the turtles, and you knew where you had hid them."
    I was waiting for that.....

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    246
    Having been in exactly the same postion I can say without question they are yours. The wife and cherubs should buy you another box just to show that they are contrite and apologetic. Didn't work out quite that way for me but we should strive for the best outcome we can every time we are unfairly accused.
    Teaching grandchildren the hobby is rewarding. Most of the time

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