Some Advice For The Ladies

[Belinda Barfield]

Ladies, when the man in your life injures himself apparently you are supposed to act loving and concerned for his wellbeing, and not say the first snappy thing that comes to mind. I just learned this and thought I should share in case you didn't get the How to Live With a Man handbook. I would also like to point out that this was not something taught to me at Possum Patty's School of Charm and Etiquette for Tomboys.

For about three days I was subjected to the Beaver Cleaver technique of acquiring a new tool or machine, in this case a nail gun.

"Gee Wally, wouldn't it be neat if we had a nail gun."

"Gee Wally, I sure could get things done faster with a nail gun."

"Gee Wally, I've got to build a packing crate and it would be so much easier with a nail gun."

"Go get a darned nail gun!"

So he did. Came back to the office and proudly pointed out that right there on the box in big letters was the phrase "75% faster than a hammer". He walked out the door whistling a happy tune.

I declare, it was not 15 minutes before he came back, cradling his left hand in his right and looking oh so embarrassed as he tried to sneak past my desk to get to the bathroom sink.

"What did you do?"

"Nothing."

"You might as well go ahead and tell me because I'm the only one who knows where the band aids are hidden."

"I shot a nail through the side of my thumb."

And that's when I said . . . "Wow, did you do it 75% faster than you could have with a hammer?"

Apparently that is considered to be a cold and insensitive remark in some circles.

[Myk Rian]

Ladies, when the man in your life injures himself apparently you are supposed to act loving and concerned for his well being, and not say the first snappy thing that comes to mind.

Well, Duh!

Apparently that is considered to be a cold and insensitive remark in some circles.

Well, Double Duh!

[Dan Hintz]

And that's when I said . . . "Wow, did you do it 75% faster than you could have with a hammer?"

Sure you don't have a single sister, Belinda? That would have been my reply, and it sounds like a sister from your tree would have kept on truckin' after I said it. The current LOML gives me sideways glances just for reminding her she once cooked a lasagna using green, fuzzy cheese.

[Mitchell Andrus]

Now THAT'S FUNNY.

You could almost hear Alice Cramden saying this.
.

[Mike Cruz]

Belinda, can I just call you Salt from now on. Seems you rubbed that one in (hysterically, I might add) intentionally and semi-undeservingly. Chances are the fault wasn't in getting a nail gun. The fault wasn't in getting the one on sale. It wasn't even even that he pestered you about it. It was, however, that he probably either hasn't used them often or didn't read the manual before using the nail gun (who of us men ever does read the manual, though...). My guess is that he shot the nail into wood and that it curled back out and caught his thumb. (This is, of course, assuming this is a finishing/brad gun, not a construction type gun...if it was the latter, ooooooch....that must have really hurt and put a nice sized hole in his thumb! ) For those of us that have used a finishing/brad nail gun, we know to keep the extra hand away from possible pokers, pop-ups, turtleheads...whatever you call them. And I have a feeling the manual warns about them.

Regardless, you are the saint of subtle, the queen of the obvious, and the salt in your hubby's wound. He HAD to get a kick out of your comment in the end...

[Rod Sheridan]

Good reply Belinda, you're a woman after my own heart.

Years ago when I had young kids my oldest daughter came into the house crying, she had crashed her bicycle full tilt into the fence.

She had a couple of cuts and scrapes.

My first question was "How's the fence"?

As I was cleaning my daughters arm and applying a band aid, she commented that I was supposed to ask how she was, my "You heal, the fence I have to repair myself" comment wasn't as funny to her as it was to me.

Some people just have a hard time with reality.

Regards, Rod.

[Belinda Barfield]

It was, however, that he probably either hasn't used them often or didn't read the manual before using the nail gun (who of us men ever does read the manual, though...). My guess is that he shot the nail into wood and that it curled back out and caught his thumb.

Regardless, you are the saint of subtle, the queen of the obvious, and the salt in your hubby's wound. He HAD to get a kick out of your comment in the end...

Mike, there is sort of a back story here. The man has used a nail gun a lot, he knows how and where to hold things. He was just in a hurry and was a little out of practice. When he got out of the remodeling business years ago he sold off almost all of his tools, and now wishes he hadn't, so I give him a little fun grief when he has to go buy something.

It wasn't a big nail and it went just by the fingernail so it really wasn't a big deal. You are correct regarding how it happend.

He laughed about my snappy comment I said it and it has sort of become a running joke between us.

I save the sympathy for when the screw gun slips and the bit goes into his finger instead of the screw. Those are usually pretty messy!

[Dan Hintz]

Mike,

The manual (yes, I read it) does say to be careful about knots in the wood... hitting one can turn the nail around, just as it did here.

[John Hart]

I shot a 2" finish nail right through the bone 2 months ago. I didn't complain or nuthin'. Just yanked that sucker out with a pair of vise grips and kept on nailin'.

grrrrr ooh ooh ooh

[alex grams]

when i was younger working in a cabinet shop i was holding a piece for a guy to nail the ends together. One got kicked sideways and i heard the gun discharge, felt a slight tug on my shirt over my stomach, then heard a *clink* on the other side of the shop wall. I looked at my shirt and had two holes about 4 inches apart (left to right) from one another. The nail went in, under my shirt, between my shirt and my stomach, and then out the other side of my stomach. I would say the nail had about a 1/2" passageway to manage to do what it did.

[glenn bradley]

I see nothing wrong with your reaction. What's wrong with us?

[Steve Schlumpf]

I had a sliver last week....



but I don't want to talk about it.

[John Hart]

I had a sliver last week....



but I don't want to talk about it.

And how far away was the sliver from you?

[Neal Clayton]

I save the sympathy for when the screw gun slips and the bit goes into his finger instead of the screw. Those are usually pretty messy!

the scars on both of my thumbs agree.

there's never any women around my shop. the two other men in there can freely make fun of each other for such things, though, which is ok (unlike your case). the typical response is "first time to use one of those?" or "what did you do that for?"

BUT THAT'S SEXIST

yes, yes it is.

[Belinda Barfield]

I shot a 2" finish nail right through the bone 2 months ago. I didn't complain or nuthin'. Just yanked that sucker out with a pair of vise grips and kept on nailin'.

grrrrr ooh ooh ooh

My SO never complains either. No matter what he just slaps a bandaid on it, or duct tape in the worst case scenario, and goes on. Me? I walked into the trailer hitch a couple of weeks ago and alternately cussed like a cheerleader and cried like a baby! When I get hurt I want everyone to share in the pain!