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Phyllis Meyer
12-04-2007, 12:17 PM
A friend of ours took his life on Saturday. He leaves two boys ages 21 and 17, and a daughter age 15. I called last night to talk with their mom and the 21 year old answered and as I told him how sorry we were for his loss and what can we do to help he said, "please pray for my family"!

Our family has been through many deaths and tragedies, and I know what to say and what to do for a family in their time of need. This one has me truly numb on the appropriate words and actions. Besides the usual gifts of sympathy, if anyone has any thoughts on right/wrong words I would appreciate your input.

Sincerely,
Phyllis

Jim O'Dell
12-04-2007, 4:14 PM
Sometimes there are no words. That's when a prayer or a shoulder to lean on is the best thing to offer. We'll keep them in our prayers. Jim.

Jude Kingery
12-04-2007, 4:21 PM
Phyllis, such a tragedy; I'd agree with Jim, the most important thing may be, indeed prayer and listening. That you're there to listen and however they feel or whatever they want to say is ok. So listening and reassurance to the surviving family members are important I'd think at a time like this. Many times people won't talk about suicide, or they're afraid it's "shameful" or something, so it's good of you to reach out to them and give them permission or as Jim said, a shoulder to lean on, to talk. Bless you. Jude

Lou Morrissette
12-04-2007, 5:03 PM
The warmth of true friendship and understanding is pretty much all one can offer at a time like this. God bless them.

Lou

Glenn Clabo
12-04-2007, 5:13 PM
As one who has lost many...from a sister and best friend at 9 years old...to a childhood sweetheart/wife for 35 years...to recently an amazing friend...there are no words. A hug...and your presence...that's what they need...and what you can give.

Dennis Peacock
12-04-2007, 5:22 PM
As one who has lost many...from a sister and best friend at 9 years old...to a childhood sweetheart/wife for 35 years...to recently an amazing friend...there are no words. A hug...and your presence...that's what they need...and what you can give.

I agree completely. Toss in a good bit of prayer for them and be there when they need ya....it's all important in a time of dispair.

Brian Weick
12-04-2007, 5:30 PM
to hear the news Phyllis, that is a tragedy and not an easy matter to handle- what can you say- that is just really,really sad- I am so sorry to hear the bad news - I hope the family can recover from this horrible incident but it is going to take some time - all you can do is support them wright now, and let them know that if they need you for anything that you are there for them.
Brian

Phyllis Meyer
12-05-2007, 11:55 AM
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers! Talking with the family has been a help to us (and we pray for them). The funeral is tomorrow. Once again, it makes you stop and think what is truly important in life. Faith, Family, and Friends for ours!

Sincerely,
Phyllis

Roy Wall
12-05-2007, 12:27 PM
Phyllis -

My prayers to the family in this difficult time...

mark page
12-05-2007, 12:45 PM
Phyllis,

My heart, thoughts, and prayers go out for the family and you. Even though most of us haven't met before, I feel we are all family here at SMC. I hope for the best,
Mark

Mitchell Andrus
12-05-2007, 2:35 PM
The Holidays... tough time for many people. The pressure to perform becomes too great sometimes.

That said, we don't know the other side of the story. I had a good friend leave us like this. Only a year later did we find out that he had terminal brain cancer. Now we understand. No less painful, but now we know what he knew.