Fun with Telemarketers

[Jim Koepke]

The idea hit me just this morning. It needs a bit of work…

With many telemarketers when the phone is answered with the usual "hello" there is a pause and then someone comes on the line and says, "hello."

This is an awkward moment. One time a second hello was said by me and then the person on the other end said, "hello" again. My response was, "goodbye."

This morning after the pause and hearing the tele-scammer say, "hello" my response was to say, "Is your car warrantee about to expire, we can save you the cost of expensive repairs… ."

They hung up.

Maybe if enough people do this they will realize tele-scamming is futile.

jtk

[Ray Newman]

When a telemarketer calls and asks for Ray Newman, I respond and tell them "This Herbert Newman. We are burying Ray Newman tomorrow." Dead silence, no response, then they hang up.

[steven c newman]

I usually just answer with...."Sheriff's Office, Fraud Desk..."

Or, just answer in Vietnamese. usually, just cussing them out for calling me......

[Dave Anderson NH]

It's amazing the response I get when I answer with "Chou Ong" and continue on in Vietnamese.

[Tom M King]

I have my phone set so it only rings if the number is in my Contacts file. No time, or patience for robo callls, telemarketers, or seekers of free advice. The ones wanting free advice always took the most time, even if I told them to start with that I didn't know of anyone to come fix their roof.

[Don Coffman]

I play them, figure if interrupted make it worthwhile. Push the prompts if a recording, get to the real person, may as well interrupt their time .... give them a fictitious vintage auto, mileage the works until they get mad and hang up.

[Axel de Pugey]

I would not like to be rude, but why is that posted in Woodworking by Hand / Neanderthal Haven?

[Charles Taylor]

This morning after the pause and hearing the tele-scammer say, "hello" my response was to say, "Is your car warrantee about to expire, we can save you the cost of expensive repairs… ."

They hung up.

Maybe if enough people do this they will realize tele-scamming is futile.


On those occasions when I'm foolish enough to answer a call from an unrecognized number, and it concerns my car's extended warranty, it's a robocaller. I don't know what it takes to qualify for a live human scammer, but apparently I'm not doing it right.

[Rich Engelhardt]

We screen all our calls - however - as annoying as they are, I remind myself that at least they are out there trying to earn a living & not just sitting around with their hand out & mouth open like some demented baby bird waiting for a freebie.

[Jim Koepke]

I would not like to be rude, but why is that posted in Woodworking by Hand / Neanderthal Haven?

That was my mistake. Thankfully one of the moderators cleaned up my mess.


We screen all our calls - however - as annoying as they are, I remind myself that at least they are out there trying to earn a living & not just sitting around with their hand out & mouth open like some demented baby bird waiting for a freebie.

Some of these so called 'telemarketers' are "trying to earn a living" by enticing people into giving their financial information and then ripping them off.

We supposedly have a national "do not call list" to which telemarketers are supposed to comply. Any telemarketer who isn't complying with this is operating outside of the law. If they are acting outside of the law, why should they get any business from me?

jtk

[Bruce Wrenn]

We never answer our land line, just let answering machine pick it up. BIL has a message in which he says "hello," followed by a pause. Amazing how many will talk till beep shuts them off. Back last year, I opened an Amazon CC just to get discount ($100) on purchase. Established a one thousand dollar credit limit, as I seldom buy from Amazon. Kids have prime accounts, so if I need something, I get them to order it. Weekly, I get calls telling me that a purchase which far exceeds my credit limit has been posted to my account, and I need to call then back at XXX-XXX-XXXX. Also get one telling me I can get a 50% discount on my Direct TV bill, just by calling the number shown on my caller ID, which we don't have. Notice, caller didn't say call Direct at their listed business number. Tried that, but didn't get 50% discount, though I did get a 10% discount for a year. As for warranty, I play them along for a few moment till I say, "I'm sorry, I meant 1988, instead of 2018." Click!

[Bill Dufour]

Older cars the odometer only went to 1,000 mile so I can tell then I have a 09 Hupmobile inherited from my mom and the odometer is under 10,000 miles.
Bill D

[Alan Rutherford]

I've played some of those games in the past but my time is worth more than that and there's a real risk of being recorded saying something that can be edited to make it sound like you agreed to something you really don't want to agree to. And some of those callers are computerized. You'd be surprised how well a computer can hold a conversation with you and then wouldn't you feel silly?

My procedure:
I ignore the caller ID although I might proceed more gently if it looks legitimate.
Pick up the phone. If the voice is already talking I hang up.
Say "Hello". If I don't hear an appropriate response in about one second, I hang up. If I hear background voices, electronic sounds, a "click" like a line is being transferred I hang up.
If I hear "Is this Alan" or "Is [my wife's name] there?" I never say "Yes". I say "Who's calling?"
If I don't get an answer I like I hang up.
If it sounds like a legitimate fund-raising or survey call I say "I can't help you" and hang up.
The few times it's actually someone I want to talk to I apologize for being so abrupt and proceed from there.

[Stephen Rosenthal]

We supposedly have a national "do not call list" to which telemarketers are supposed to comply. Any telemarketer who isn't complying with this is operating outside of the law. If they are acting outside of the law, why should they get any business from me?

jtk

The do not call list is the most ineffective toothless law in existence. It was created to make the great unwashed, i.e., us, think that our elected officials are doing something productive instead of feeding at the trough.

I don’t answer and block all calls from any number I don’t recognize. All the friends, associates, clients, businesses I deal with, etc., are in my contacts. Legitimate callers who aren’t will almost always leave a voicemail. I’ve actually gotten calls from my own number! That’s how sophisticated these scumbags have become.

Btw, I also have a free app that is pretty effective at screening and automatically blocking spam/telemarketers. It’s from ATT, but I’m sure other carriers offer something similar.

[Mike Soaper]

I would not like to be rude, but why is that posted in Woodworking by Hand / Neanderthal Haven?

I thought it was there for folks that still use rotary phones:)

[Bill Dufour]

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/telephone-scam-artist-picked-wrong-target-former-fbi-cia-director-n970626

Bill D

[John Lanciani]

Life is too short; if the call isn't from a number in my contact list it goes to voice mail. Leave a message and I'll call you back, if it's not important enough to leave a message it certainly wasn't important enough for me to answer in the first place.

[Myk Rian]

Life is too short; if the call isn't from a number in my contact list it goes to voice mail. Leave a message and I'll call you back, if it's not important enough to leave a message it certainly wasn't important enough for me to answer in the first place.
^^^^this ^^^^

[glenn bradley]

Maybe if enough people do this they will realize tele-scamming is futile.

If only it were. We "normal" people shake our heads and have to believe that the number of hang-ups and angry responses would make telemarketing a non-starter. Unfortunately the reality is that even with a 90+% failure rate, telemarketing still makes money. Lot's of folks are talking about reforms to protect consumers but, I fear it will be like fixing Social Security. As soon as part of it is fixed there is someone wearing away at it again.

[Jim Koepke]

This person's way of handling telemarketers will quack you up > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnzzvqTPTeY

jtk

[Andy Haney]

I cracked up one day when my daughter went into a routine something like...No, he's not here. You have reached the erectile disfunction hotline. We have several experts who can help you. Please give us some detail concerning your specific ED issues and we'll direct you to the best counselor to help with your problems.

Andy

[Kev Williams]

I always loved Danny Divito's "I love wrong numbers" answer in "Ruthless People". I've never been brave enough to try something like that myself... ;)

[Roger Feeley]

I always loved Danny Divito's "I love wrong numbers" answer in "Ruthless People". I've never been brave enough to try something like that myself... ;)
I love Ruthless People! My wife’s favorite line:”I’ve been kidnapped by KMart!” Of course she’s a total Bette Midler fan. A few years ago for Christmas I gave her a list tour dates. She chose the O2 in London which was part of my evil plan. We stopped off for a couple of days learning spinning from Terry Tynan.

[Bruce Wrenn]

"US Marshal's office, fraud division, how can we help you?" Click, and buzz, instantly!

[Andre Packwood]

When I still had a land line, I would often receive calls from "Microsoft Windows security department" (definitely from a call center in India) telling me my computer had got a virus and they would guide me to the steps required to clean my computer. So I always told them that I was going right away to my computer, but had to ask a question first :

"Is your mother proud of you and the job you do? You are a thief, a fraudster, and you steal money from defenseless older people !"

Then I would hear their surprised and trembling voice tell me they were not thieves and then they would hang up.

[Rich Engelhardt]

Some of these so called 'telemarketers' are "trying to earn a living" by enticing people into giving their financial information and then ripping them off.Which separates those people from the telemarketers - the annoying ones that call offering extended car warranty's, lawn care, etc.
But - as I mentioned, I screen the calls - so - leave a message, if I know you or it's a legitimate call, I'll call back.
Like mentioned above - life's too short.

[Perry Hilbert Jr]

We got a lot of calls for the electric supplier choice program in PA. We get to choose who supplies our electric although it all comes through some other company's lines. Anyway, when they call wanting me to switch and I answer, they usually start some confusing crap about how they are trying to alert me to some over charge. I flat out ask, what are you selling. They usually say nothing, and continue on with their canned speech about saving me money. . After they get another 20 seconds into it, I ask why I should buy anything from a company whose employee lies to me about the nature of the call, That it isn't a very good first impression for a company representative to be lying in the first 15 seconds of the call. Would you deal with a company that lies?

Or, when they call trying to save me money on my electric bill, I interrupt frequently and ask how much they pay. To which they often say, they are trying to save me money. And I just ask again, how much do you pay me for electric. I just put in all those solar panels and wind turbines and I want the company that pays e the most. I don't want to save money on my bill, I want to make money on my bill.

I was visiting a client once for signatures to some documents and the phone rang, he answered and the sales person started their pitch. Suddenly the client starts yelling into the phone, But I never touched your wife. Why do you keep calling here? I would not touch that ugly bitch for less than a million dollars and a truck load of penicillin. Syphilis must be affecting your brain. What makes you think I would be interested in THAT? If you call here again, I will track you down and do some serious harm. Then he hangs up and smiles.

[Osvaldo Cristo]

Down here we had a case a guy was a target for a telemarketing company calling him an unreasonable number of times. This guy worked as an IT senior and he decided to pay tooth-by-a-tooth and constructed a bot to call most of the lines of that call center.

Soon he received a formal promise from that company to never again call him as well a request for excuses.

Happy end... but it took a lot of work.

[Myk Rian]

I get calls from Jackie or Sally. It's from Matrix Medical wanting to do home health visits. A freebee.

We had our last home visit 3 yrs ago. It will be our last. We aren't invalid.
2 weeks after the visit, the calls started. Matrix medical offering a free in home checkup.

I have 7-8 phone numbers they use blocked. Jackie and Sally go right to voice mail. Among a half dozen or so others.

[Bob Coates]

Bought a new landline phone system that you can set to screen calls.
Short version: The caller must press the # key (this eliminates robo calls) to talk to you if they are not in your phone book. If they don't phone never rings. Filters out about 8 calls/day. You can also put the number in a block list so they won't get screening. Other options available. I have the vtect, but believe Att has the same type.

[Lee Schierer]

Bought a new landline phone system that you can set to screen calls.
Short version: The caller must press the # key (this eliminates robo calls) to talk to you if they are not in your phone book. If they don't phone never rings. Filters out about 8 calls/day. You can also put the number in a block list so they won't get screening. Other options available. I have the vtect, but believe Att has the same type.

The problem with the type of device you describe is that the spammers are spoofing phone numbers so they have an infinite number of phone numbers to use, including the ones in your directory. I've seen numbers on my caller ID from the local businesses and even my own number. The other problem is that you screen legitimate calls from doctors, car repair shops, etc.

[Kev Williams]

There USED to be a similar stand-alone device that went off the market a few years ago, never seen it again- what was different was that ANYONE who called was greeted with something simple like "press 1 to continue this call"... If 1 wasn't pressed, you never knew about it. Doesn't help with 'live' callers, but no robocalls, and spoofing doesn't matter...

[Jim Koepke]

My phone allows blocking spam callers by number. The problem is the storage of blocked numbers is finite, the spoofed numbers are not.

There was something on the news recently about a step up of enforcement in the works. That would likely be welcome by most folks.

jtk

[Meryl Logue]

A heartwarming story!