Essential fixit skills for a teenager leaving the nest?

[Sam Shankar]

My 18yo stepson leaves for college (god willing) in a few months. Though he has been with me 50% of the time for fourteen years, he is not a hands-on kid, and has never taken to making or fixing things with his hands. What can I say - you can lead a horse to water, etc.

Though he is going to live in a dorm where he will presumably not need to do much fixing of anything, I still can't let him out of the nest without knowing a few things. I just have a few more months to force-feed some of that knowledge. Question is...what are those super basic essential skills?

Here's my working list:

How to hang a picture
How to put a shelf in a wall (find studs/use drywall anchors/etc)
How to put on a spare tire
How to jump start the car
How to hammer a nail
How to pump up his bike tires and adjust his brakes
How to troubleshoot a dead outlet and reset a circuit breaker


What else?

[Scott Winners]

If he can cook he will be able to date girls two classes up from his status, whatever that is. Nice girls.

[Jim Koepke]

Common things that need fixing are toilets, stopped, constant running or won't flush.

Maybe how to repair a leaky faucet. How to turn off the water.

How to check an electrical circuit to make sure the power is off if he has to replace a switch.

He may need to learn about using a gas stove without a pilot. He may need to know how to relight a pilot light.

Handy things to know are how to get into a car if you lock your keys inside. He may need to know about changing the oil and checking the coolant level.

If he is going to be cooking for himself there are things to know like punching a hole in the bottom of a can of refried beans helps the contents come out eaiser.

There are still some bottles that require a bottle opener to remove the top. Show him how to do that with keys, a screw driver or other methods. How to remove a cork from a wine bottle by carefully hitting the bottom of the bottle against a log. It might shake up the contents but most college kids don't care about that. It will impress the others. Then some physics major will explain how it works.

Does he know how to do laundry?

jtk

[Mel Fulks]

You have a good practical list. My suggestion is talk with your wife about what you both want to say to
him about alcohol and drugs. She's probably thinking and worrying about her son and would love to have
help and backup with rules,warnings ,and incentives. Things like what it costs to spend a night in jail are
good too . I think that if you are not showering a kid with money it's good for them to know how
expensive a night in jail can be. Most of them get " will not stay there again " reviews.

[George Yetka]

I would say have him rebuild the lawn mower engine or some other way to test his mind. If he can do it with your supervision he has a mechanical though process. Get him a basic toolbox and youtube will take him the rest of the way. If not I would figure on teaching things individually.

[Prashun Patel]

He won’t learn any of it unless he wants to. Has he shown interest?

[Peter Mich]

I wish parents of several of my former college housemates had been so considerate as to make sure they could clean bathrooms, use a vacuum cleaner and do the dishes.

[Jim Matthews]

+1 on knowing the location of the main water shutoff .
+1 1/2 on verifying that valve works - before the flood.

Use a fire extinguisher on a live fire (outside).
Learn how to extinguish a grease fire, clean a grease trap or filter in a stove hood.

Eat the leftovers, first.

[Frederick Skelly]

He won’t learn any of it unless he wants to. Has he shown interest?

I keep thinking the same thing. I think I'd focus on car emergencies. I'd buy him a set of jumper cables and teach him how to use them. Then I'd teach him how to change a tire. Also give him a tire gauge and teach him how to check pressures. These are things he may very well need short term, while at school. He can learn tne rest from you later as he needs it.

[William Fretwell]

You could mention that fixing things for girls often has fringe benefits, they cook you lunch, then dinner, then breakfast.
Preventative maintenance: Are you on the pill? Teach him about the ovulation cycle, good and bad times, changing diapers.
Drug education very important. Naloxone, last chance recovery.
Girls that can cook are quite rare, makes you wonder what their mothers have ben doing all these years! I was cooking family meals at 10 yrs old but my mother was the best cook in the county, she won the huge contest to prove it, the mayor then gave her the job of cooking cakes for the queen on her visit.

[Bill Dufour]

Learn to tell time on a anlaog clock and learn clockwise and counterclockwise for nuts/bolts/screws. How to use a rotary phone
Bill D

[Alan Rutherford]

He should know how to use a simple multimeter to measure voltage and current **. Make sure he has one. He should know the difference between AC and DC. He should understand what it takes to make a flashlight bulb light starting with a bulb, battery(s) and a few pieces of wire.

And don't get me started on Sex Ed, although I bet he already knows the basics.

[** Edit: And continuity.]

[Lee DeRaud]

How to use a rotary phoneHow far to pull the choke out to start the car when it's cold.

Wait a minute, how old IS this thread?

[Sam Shankar]

I am loving this thread. I think the points about pitching this as a "girls will be impressed when..." are brilliant.

[Stan Calow]

First aid, CPR.

Replace wiper blades; +1 on laundry; wash dishes by hand; fix a broken shelf.

[Lee DeRaud]

A lot of the "essential" plumbing/electrical skills mentioned here won't matter until he's in his own place: I'm pretty sure the powers-that-be will take issue with him doing such repairs in his dorm room or common areas.

[Roger Feeley]

Basic troubleshooting for wireless network connectivity. This includes understanding ip adresses, dhcp, etc.

[Perry Hilbert Jr]

My mother's list for each of her boys, At age 15, was to plan, cook and serve a weeks' meals and clean up the kitchen after ward., to do our own laundry, iron a shirt, to sew on a button, Dad already made sure we knew how to change a tire, jump start a car, hammer a nail. etc. I like to cook. I cook most of the meals here. Once, my wife wanted home made chicken noodle soup, but we had no noodles. No problem, I made the noodles from scratch from memory of watching my grandmother and mother do it. You can make a lot from next to nothing if you learn how to cook.

[Tom M King]

My Dad never taught me how to do anything. He just told me to go do whatever it was.

[Roger Feeley]

Maybe you should think his ability to take phone advice and instruction from you. You never know what is going to come up and you are certain to get a call about fixing something that you can do. The question is whether you can talk him through it. Being a youngster, he can watch a YouTube video but may have additional questions.

[Roger Feeley]

I am loving this thread. I think the points about pitching this as a "girls will be impressed when..." are brilliant.

I've always said, "Handsome fades but handy is forever."

[Thomas McCurnin]

How to assemble Ikea cabinets

[Lee DeRaud]

How to assemble Ikea cabinetsAfter several hilariously unsuccessful attempts to teach people this skill, I have concluded that if you don't have the IKEA gene, no amount of training will make up for it.

And unfortunately, it's probably the most important freshman dorm skill mentioned here so far.

[Aaron Rosenthal]

Teach him to decide on a profession that makes him enough money so he can hire people to do what all of us have advised you to teach him.

[Curt Harms]

Teach him to decide on a profession that makes him enough money so he can hire people to do what all of us have advised you to teach him.

That's fine to a point but things too often don't have problems at 8:30 a.m. on a Tuesday morning, they have problems at 8 p.m. on a major holiday. Finding someone on short notice on holidays and weekends can be ..... difficult. Knowing how to keep things working for a day or two doesn't hurt. But more on topic someone living in a dorm isn't going to need plumbing and electrical skills short term. Being automotive and computer/networking savvy may pay off.

[Ole Anderson]

Checking and changing oil in his car. My granddaughter called saying her two year old car was running very poorly and she was stuck by the side of the road on a Sunday. She did say that the change oil light was on. I told her how to check the oil. There was none on the dipstick, the car had gone into limp-home mode. She had the car for 8000 miles and never changed the oil. Limped into a gas station, added two quarts of oil and it ran fine. Monday she had the oil changed.

[Patrick McCarthy]

Bet it was the “Check Oil” light . . . Just sayin’ . . .

[Alex Zeller]

It's an either or thing. Either you get a great education and make lots of money to pay "the guy" to take care of stuff or you learn how to fix stuff. The simple fact is even if you don't know how to repair a furnace you still want to be able to understand what the guy is telling you. Otherwise how will you know if you are being taken advantage of? Skills should include basic car and home maintenance of course as well as any hobbies that they are interested in.

[Kev Williams]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDXN7T3-Jrg << the bare essential... :)

[Jim Koepke]

The simple fact is even if you don't know how to repair a furnace you still want to be able to understand what the guy is telling you.

Most people do not know that a furnace operates at the same intensity no matter where one sets the thermostat. It will not heat the room any faster if it is set to 90º.

As far as plumbing goes a person should at least know how to turn the water off if need be.

There are a lot of common sense things people should know. Today's problem seems to be that common sense is rather rare.

jtk

[Kev Williams]

Most people do not know that a furnace operates at the same intensity no matter where one sets the thermostat. It will not heat the room any faster if it is set to 90º...


Not exactly true, depends on the furnace... my Goodman furnace has a 2-stage burner, the high-stage always fires first, then reverts to the low-stage about 3 seconds later. What exactly will keep the high-stage going I'm not exactly sure as I've never had to heat a cold house with it. And in my garage I have a nat-gas ventless wall heater with a 2-stage burner. There's not an actual thermostat on it or for it, but wherever the knob sits will keep the garage a consistent temperature. But if it's cold and you want it warm fast, crank the knob and it'll go from it's normal 22k-btu flame to a 30k flame... :)

[Jim Koepke]

Not exactly true, depends on the furnace...

True, some of the room heaters in my younger days likely wouldn't pass code today. The gas flow was adjustable by the operator. They were also dangerous if the pilot blew out.

Many common heating systems are either flame on or flame off.

jtk

[Michael J Evans]

My Dad never taught me how to do anything. He just told me to go do whatever it was.

Same here Tom.

Sad part is my dad knows damn near just about every handy skill.

My lesson in driving a clutch "here's the keys don't burn up the clutch"

[Rod Sheridan]

My 18yo stepson leaves for college (god willing) in a few months. Though he has been with me 50% of the time for fourteen years, he is not a hands-on kid, and has never taken to making or fixing things with his hands. What can I say - you can lead a horse to water, etc.

Though he is going to live in a dorm where he will presumably not need to do much fixing of anything, I still can't let him out of the nest without knowing a few things. I just have a few more months to force-feed some of that knowledge. Question is...what are those super basic essential skills?

Here's my working list:

How to hang a picture
How to put a shelf in a wall (find studs/use drywall anchors/etc)
How to put on a spare tire
How to jump start the car
How to hammer a nail
How to pump up his bike tires and adjust his brakes
How to troubleshoot a dead outlet and reset a circuit breaker


What else?

I've found the most important item is for them to teach their father how to email them money, that seems to fix all issues......We call it "The Bank of Dad".

Regards, Rod.

P.S. Your list looks pretty good except for the last item, for 2 reasons, safety and there probably are restrictions on operation of electrical equipment such as resetting a protective device in a dorm.

[Stan Calow]

You could mention that fixing things for girls often has fringe benefits, they cook you lunch, then dinner, then breakfast.


Good reason to teach your girls the same skills.

[Prashun Patel]

Right on Stan.

[Charlie Velasquez]

Maybe you should think his ability to take phone advice and instruction from you. You never know what is going to come up and you are certain to get a call about fixing something that you can do. The question is whether you can talk him through it. Being a youngster, he can watch a YouTube video but may have additional questions.

This.

Talk about emergency repairs, especially toilet and plumbing. Everything else he/she can learn via YouTube or phone calls.

My son switched out outlets, corrected a 3-way switch, changed spark plugs (no simple task, had to remove half the air intake system to get to two of them), installed a ceiling fan, and others over the phone. He set his smart phone on a tripod, used WhatsApp to video call me, and we did them all; he did the actual manual movements, I explained what to do and why each step was necessary from the comfort of my sofa during my covid sheltering at home.

[Myk Rian]

Troubleshooting skills. How to trace the problem to its' cause.

As an apprentice in 1970, the first skill I learned was how to hold a flashlight for the journeymen.

[Dave Mills]

Not exactly "fix it" skills, but a quick course in money management (checking accounts, credit cards, savings, investments) would be good to have.

[Sam Shankar]

So much good thinking in this thread. Here's a really important followup. What goes in the minimalist tool kit I give him so that *when* he calls asking for help, I can start by saying "now is the time to open up that little bag that you rolled your eyes at me for giving you!"

[Stan Calow]

They sell these minimalist tool kits in a plastic case at auto stores you can put under the seat or in the trunk. I think it has pliers, ratcheting pliers, a couple of screwdrivers, crescent wrench, and maybe needle nose pliers. Mine came in handy in unexpected situations. Don't forget the duct tape.

[Lee DeRaud]

They sell these minimalist tool kits in a plastic case at auto stores you can put under the seat or in the trunk. I think it has pliers, ratcheting pliers, a couple of screwdrivers, crescent wrench, and maybe needle nose pliers. Mine came in handy in unexpected situations. Don't forget the duct tape.Next rung up the food chain is the bootbox-sized one from Harbor Freight: https://www.harborfreight.com/hand-tools/tool-sets/105-piece-tool-kit-4030.html
Way better than you'd expect...most sets like this have a gazillion hex wrenches to pad the tool count.

[Charlie Velasquez]

They sell these minimalist tool kits in a plastic case at auto stores you can put under the seat or in the trunk. I think it has pliers, ratcheting pliers, a couple of screwdrivers, crescent wrench, and maybe needle nose pliers. Mine came in handy in unexpected situations. Don't forget the duct tape.

We have a couple almost identical to this.
455344
Instead of the utility knife it has a level.
The screw driver has about 12 different bits.
I added a smaller snap off blade utility knife, fits under the indent for the pliers,
duct tape, when I was down to about 3’ on a roll I cut the roll to be about an inch wide, then flattened the roll on my vise. it fits in the indent under the open end part of the wrenches,
and a 9 volt snap on flashlight fits perfectly in one compartment of the small parts container

[Michael Weber]

Personal finance and how and what it takes to avoid becoming a slave to debt. The wisdom of saving a percentage of income in an IRA or comparable device and the power of time’s affect on savings.

[Kev Williams]

"Personal finance and how and what it takes to avoid becoming a slave to debt"

The hardest parts to drill into millennials heads that I've found: convincing (some of) them that they're actually NOT entitled to an infinite supply of unearned goods, services, food, shelter and cash just because they were born.

Not even necessarily millennials, we have a 39 year old who still insists that because he's our kid, it's our job to send him cash whenever he's strapped-- which would be fine if he ever paid any of it back. About 6 months ago I offered to be his payday loan company, gave him $200, told him it's interest free, just pay it back how/when you can, and it'll be available next time. If it works out, I'll raise the limit...

Never saw a dime come back.

[Cary Falk]

While I agree that all the things on the list are great to know how to do, I must say that a lot of the stuff will never be needed in college or even if they get out and live in an apartment. I learned some stuff from my dad and uncles when I was a kid. As an adult I had to figure a lot more stuff out on my own. Mostly because I am cheap. The good thing about the current times is there is a video for how to do about anything on the internet. I have also learned from step daughter, son in law, and wife is that if you don't have a desire to learn XYZ then any amount of information will not motivate them to do it. Something that is obscure/difficult and takes many hours to achieve/obtain will happen long before something quick and easy depending on the interest level. I always ask if they want to know how to fix the issue and they say no just make it work. I'm not sure if after I am gone if they will be able to function. My sister just bought a house and she never learned anything as a kid. My brother and I always get calls with questions but she wants to learn now.