A frightening experience

[Bob Noles]

UPS just delivered a large box from PSI this morning and in it was a bunch of lathe chisels.

Those are some scary looking instruments :eek: :eek:

Am I sure I want to do this? :D :rolleyes: :p

Where is John Hart when you need him...... Which one is Bertha? :confused:

[Clem Wixted]

You were fairly warned before you took the step to order those addictive instruments. You have only taken the first of many such steps and with each purchase you will be compelled to think of (need) many other items to furthur plunge down the slippery slope of turning. The addiction becomes stronger and stronger while using those instruments.

Now here is a solution.

Pack it all up and send it back and forget all about it.

You have been warned, again. :)

Clem

[Andy Hoyt]

Bob - Don't send that stuff back! They will not give you a full credit for the return.

So, send it all to me; and I will give you FULL CREDIT for being such a nice guy and sending me all sorts of new free stuff to play with.:D

[Rich Stewart]

Just do it. Chuck up a piece if wood, start it spinning and touch it with something. You'll be fine.

[John Hart]

......... Which one is Bertha? :confused:

You need to stroke each one....ever so gently...and then you'll know.;)

AND DON'T SEND THEM TO ANDY! :p

[Raymond Overman]

It has been proven that woodturning causes the following ailments:

Sleepless nights
Daydreaming at work
Poor driving habits (looking for burl in the woods along the road)
Alienation of loved ones (look at what I turned last night)
Obssesive compulsive disorder (finishing techniques)
Eye strain
Back strain
Carpel tunnel syndrome
Old age in men (just look at 80% of local club members)
Financial strain
Malnourishment (food or a new oval skew? I NEED the skew.)
Pride, Envy, and wood gluttony

I'm sure there are others that I've missed. The Tree Surgeon General should put a warning label on all tools associated with wood turning warning people about these things before they get started. An educated public would be better prepared when faced with the peer pressure to get into turning. Also, maybe it would make someone think twice before jumping in, which would leave more burl for those of us already addicted.

Good luck with the contents of that box Bob. There is no "turning" back now.

[Michael Stafford]

Look Bob, woodturning is easy. First you put a piece of wood between the centers and you take a chisel with a large deep U-shape and you beat that piece of wood with that chisel until it is round. :p It helps to turn on the lathe so that you get it beat round on all sides. At least that is what I do.:eek:

Then you take another chisel and beat it round some more. You keep changing chisels and beating the wood until you get the shape you like. Then you take some sandpaper and beat the wood with that until you get the chisel marks out of it. After a while and after enough sandpaper it will be smooth. Then you slop some finish on it and let that dry.:p

Take it off the lathe and show it to your wife. If she lets you keep it in the house you are a woodturner. ;) If she doesn't go back and beat enough pieces of wood with enough chisels until she does. Either way it is great fun.

I call it the fine art of woodbludgeoning. :D

After a while you will need a bigger lathe and lots more chisels, lots more sandpaper, lots more finish, wax, buffing wheels, photo booths and a myriad of other expensive gadgets. Heck you will even start wearing Darth Vader masks and aprons, who wouldn't like that? Sooner or later you will not be satisfied with the tools you can buy and you will start making your own. John Hart skipped buying tools and went straight to making his own and saved lots of money. He beats his wood round both on the inside and the outside. Lots of others do that also. I just try to get mine mostly round.

Have fun with it. Seek the advice of an experienced turner or find an American Association of Woodturners chapter in your area and join to get some instruction. :D

[Rich Stewart]

Buahahahahahahahahahaha.

[Andy Hoyt]

Bob - You can also do what our fearless moderator does. He lurks in the SMC Turning Forum, and "occasionally" makes an encouraging comment or two. After a while, enough attrition has taken place with the other posters in the forum (usually because of ailments caused by inhaling all sorts of noxiously toxic wood dust or severed jugular veins caused by improperly chucked sharp-edged spinny things) such that all current members just assume he actually is such a fantastic turner that he never needs to actually post something he spun up.

Or.... Do what I do. I hang out on another forum that's centered in Kuala Lumpur. When something good surfaces I just right click/save as/and post on SMC. I recall you said you were on a budget this method is far less expensive. Don't even need to buy one of them fancy lather things.

[Dave Smith]

A book recommendation. Woodturning: Two Books in One. By Phil Irons.
I also recommend Bill Gtoobig's DVD on bowl turning.
Order the sanding roll ends box for turners from Klingspore.

Good luck.

Dave Smith

Rain is cold, it must be close to winter in Longview, WA.

[roy knapp]

Hey Bob please let me know how you realy like it. I may add category to my woodworking.:) :)

[Normah Binti]

Or.... Do what I do. I hang out on another forum that's centered in Kuala Lumpur. When something good surfaces I just right click/save as/and post on SMC. I recall you said you were on a budget this method is far less expensive. Don't even need to buy one of them fancy lather things.


So you man who steal my pictures?!?

[John Hart]

C'mon Normah...he dint mean nuthin' buy it!!! 'Sides....yer not that good anyway....We've seen the pictures!!!!:D :D :D

[Andy Hoyt]

So you man who steal my pictures?!?

Normah - Sent you a PM:o

[Normah Binti]

C'mon Normah...he dint mean nuthin' buy it!!! 'Sides....yer not that good anyway....We've seen the pictures!!!!:D :D :D

Mr.Hart not funny man! I just learn soon. Mr.Andy steal me! Unfair!
He make pretty work huh? :D

[Andy Hoyt]

Not buying a lathe ---- $0

Buying a PC instead ---- $1000 +/-


C'mon Normah...he dint mean nuthin' buy it!!! 'Sides....yer not that good anyway....We've seen the pictures!!!!:D :D :D -------- priceless!

[Ken Fitzgerald]

I don't turn....not sure I want to based on this thread.....these guys have beens sniffing too much CA me thinks!

[Bob Noles]

Y'all are killing me :D :D

I think you have been breathing too much sawdust :p :p

I've been in there watching Bill G's DVD and learning just how much I don't know yet, but I'm almost up with John :cool:

[John Hart]

Mr.Hart not funny man! I just learn soon. Mr.Andy steal me! Unfair!
He make pretty work huh? :D

Yeah....real pretty. I especially liked that Jungle Rot Ash Tray he posted the other day. Oh by the way WELCOME TO THE CREEK NORMAH!! Wanna go out for drinks later? ;)

[Ken Fitzgerald]

Come on guys.....own up........You've been practising turning for that ItsyBitsy contest thing......Don't ....I repeat......Don't use the oak that came from those used barrels from Tennesee!:eek: :D :D

[Normah Binti]

Oh by the way WELCOME TO THE CREEK NORMAH!! Wanna go out for drinks later? ;)

Persons call you Mr.Hart Braker I bet! Mr.Andy sent me PM asking for marriage! :eek: I say no to man who steal me! Then other man want to brake hart. This danger place!

[John Hart]

Come on guys.....own up........You've been practising turning for that ItsyBitsy contest thing......Don't ....I repeat......Don't use the oak that came from those used barrels from Tennesee!:eek: :D :D

Ken...If I may quote you....Wade on in..The water's fine!!:D :p

[Andy Hoyt]

.... I've been in there watching Bill G's DVD and learning just how much I don't know yet, but I'm almost up with John :cool:

Bob - Nicely put, and you're right too. You will never not know as much as John doesn't know.

[Andy Hoyt]

..... Mr.Andy sent me PM asking for marriage! ...

Did not. It was only a suggestion to come up to my place and see my turnings, err your turn.. umm---- our turnings.

[Ernie Nyvall]

Where is John Hart when you need him...... Which one is Bertha? :confused:

Looks like John is being chased down by Normah and busy right now or maybe it's the other way around.:D

Are you getting butterflies Bob? Mixed with being a little antsy to get it on? Well join the club for every time you turn that spinny thing on.:p

Ernie

[Jim Becker]

Drugs and smoking have nothing on woodturning when it comes to addiction! Round and round it goes...when you can stop...nobody knows! (except St Peter)

[John Bailey]

I don't turn, and after reading this post, I probably won't. However, two things I will do is:

1. Keep reading the "Entertainment Forum." (thats the turner's)

2. Buy me a lathe and one tool and set it on automatic so I can get the benefits of the airborn dust it creates.

John

[Ernie Nyvall]

I don't turn, and after reading this post, I probably won't. However, two things I will do is:

1. Keep reading the "Entertainment Forum." (thats the turner's)

2. Buy me a lathe and one tool and set it on automatic so I can get the benefits of the airborn dust it creates.

John

Hey John, it's the airborne dust from some exotics that make some of the people ( I wont mention names but their initials stand for John Hart, Loy Hayes, John Miliunas, Carole Valentine, Andy Hoyt, Dennis Peacock, Bill Stevener, Keith Burns, Jim Ketron, Chris Barton, Dick Parr, Bruce Shiverdecker, Travis Stinson, Michael Stafford, Harry Pye, Jeremiah Jordan, and certainly not at the bottom of the list Jim Becker... to name a few) in this forum so whacky and entertaining.

Ernie

[Bob Noles]

I don't turn, and after reading this post, I probably won't. However, two things I will do is:

1. Keep reading the "Entertainment Forum." (thats the turner's)

2. Buy me a lathe and one tool and set it on automatic so I can get the benefits of the airborn dust it creates.

John

John,

Never knew what I had been missing at SMC until I fell down that flight of stairs and ended up down here :p

Partying with this bunch is a hoot :D :D

[Carole Valentine]

Hey John, it's the airborne dust from some exotics that make some of the people ( I wont mention names but their initials stand for John Hart, Loy Hayes, John Miliunas, Carole Valentine, Andy Hoyt, Dennis Peacock, Bill Stevener, Keith Burns, Jim Ketron, Chris Barton, Dick Parr, Bruce Shiverdecker, Travis Stinson, Michael Stafford, Harry Pye, Jeremiah Jordan, and certainly not at the bottom of the list Jim Becker... to name a few) in this forum so whacky and entertaining.

Ernie
It's the lacquer fumes! Why else do you think John likes to finish everything with lacquer?:D

[John Hart]

(hic*) :o :p

[Loy Hawes]

Hey John, it's the airborne dust from some exotics that make some of the people ( I wont mention names but their initials stand for John Hart, Loy Hayes,...........


Ernie,Ernie,Ernie,......repeat after me A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X NOT Y and Z.


:D :D :D :D

[Andy Hoyt]

Hey folks, check this out. Found it in a thread over in enemy territory.



Uh.... Andy, what's a face plate?

I'm still trying to figure out how to plug this rascal in :D :D

It has finally arrived :eek:

[Bob Noles]

Hey folks, check this out. Found it in a thread over in enemy territory.

Andy....

I was going to keep that quite as I may have to return this one as it appears the lathe may be too big. Have you seen all those itty bitty things these guys and gals are making :eek: :D

I was hoping to make a picture of the lathe tomorrow, but I am having trouble finding one of these huge dimes to put next to it so it will look smaller :rolleyes:

[Bernie Weishapl]

Congrats Bob. Wanna see a picture. I will know tonight if I am getting the Delta or if I will have to wait and see how you like yours. I think if I don't get the Delta, I will be ordering one like yours.

Andy and Bob on your question of screws for the face plate David Marks and I can't remember the other site I was reading but anyway they said use sheet metal screws because they have deeper threads and will hold better.

[Soulash Binti]

I am Binti of Kelana Jaya. I lookin wives here. Have seen them you? Gracius reweard is offerd.

[John Hart]

yeah Soulash...They're here....They're in need of guidance too. Why don't you grab your banjo, and your sisters...err..your cousins...err your wives....whatever...and take 'em home. Get yourself a good leash.

[Kaoula Binti]

yeah Soulash...They're here....They're in need of guidance too. Why don't you grab your banjo, and your sisters...err..your cousins...err your wives....whatever...and take 'em home. Get yourself a good leash.
You no Hartbraker! You traitor! You tell mean husband where we be. He come take u

Ayieeeeee! (scuffle, struggle, drag)