How woodworkers think

[John Seybold]

Inspired by Darcy's post (http://www.sawmillcreek.org/showthread.php?252292-Little-American-and-German-iron):

Woodworker: I was thinking of making a coffee table for the living room
Woodworker’s spouse: Great!
WW: What size do you think it should be?
WS: I don’t know, maybe like this? [holds out arms]
WW: [measuring] OK, 29.75” wide, and about 5 feet long.
WS: Umm, OK…it could be a little narrower…
WW: No, no, 29.75” exactly is perfect.


[Time passes]


WS: I’m home! Why is our lawn all torn up?
WW: Oh, the utility guys had to do some work.
WS: Through the flowerbeds?
WW: Yeah, I argued with them, but you know how those guys are. Whaddaya gonna do?


[A couple of days later]


WS: I’m home! Why is there a big truck parked in our driveway?
WW: It’s a lowboy.
WS: OK, why is there a lowboy in our driveway?
WW: They just delivered our new planer. Want to see it?
WS: That thing is the size of a car!
WW: Yes, it’s a 30” Oliver planer from 1941. Beautiful, isn’t it? Here, let me fire it up!


[Sound of a 747 revving up for takeoff. The entire house starts vibrating. A massive plume of chips spews out of the top of the machine]


WW: IT’S A BIT NOISY! AND I HAVEN’T GOT THE DUST COLLECTION SET UP YET.
WS: ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?


[Turns off planer]


WS: [In a dangerously measured voice] Does this have anything to do with our lawn?
WW: Umm…maybe?
WS: WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING, YOU IDIOT?
WW: Well, when you told me you wanted a 29.75” coffee table, I knew I needed a 30” planer. And then I needed a 480 volt circuit, so you see, it’s all perfectly logical.
WS: Wait, *I* said the table needed to be 29.75”?
WW: Yeah, but that’s OK, because I can use the planer for a lot of things. And the jointer.
WS: The WHAT?
WW: Oh, I didn’t mention the jointer? That’s coming tomorrow. I mean, I figure I already have the 480v circuit, so…

[David Edinger]

Very good story - I could see that really happening too!

[Jerome Sidley]

Stuff like that "Never" happens :)

[Rod Sheridan]

Very funny, however perhaps the word "think" should be replaced with "Act" :D

[Frederick Skelly]

That was really funny! And true, from what I can tell.
Thanks for the laugh!
Fred

[Stan Calow]

it's a matter of physics: new project = new tool that's how i explain it to SWMBO.

[Darcy Warner]

If I have to explain or justify a machine or tool purchase to a woman ever again, I will get rid of the woman.

[Jim Becker]

Spot on!!!!!!

[Erik Christensen]

been married to same woman for almost 4 decades and she has never once questioned the need/cost of a tool I want to acquire but...... that door swings both ways gentleman

during that same time i have never questioned the need/cost of her new clothes/shoes, the new house paint (inside or outside), floor coverings, wall art, jewelry, vacations, etc.

peace is never free at either the household or national level

[Malcolm McLeod]

If I have to explain or justify a woman to a machine or tool purchase ever again, I will get rid of the machine or tool.

...I just picked the right woman to start with.:)

[Kerry Wright]

Erik,
+1
That's the way it works (and works well) in our household!

[Darcy Warner]

It's how I make a living, I got rid of one that bitched about everything (she wasn't complaining when I put her through nursing school, took care of our kids and paid for everything else).

[Patrick Walsh]

I decided a long time ago i did not want to explain or justify one iota of anyhting to anyone when i got home from work.

No wife and no kids for me and for me its heavenly bliss! I know its not for everyone but it suits me very well. I dont much need company. I think most like having someone around or are lost when left to themself. I love it!

All my maried friends co workers so forth and so on all live in some sick form of perpetual fear and or weird combination of proactive avoidance of creating any kind of uprising or problem with the wife. Im sure if i had girlfriends they would feel much the same way about their husbands. I have never understood why one would subject themself to such missery. It really does not loo like any fun. Seems extremely masacistic if nothing else.

And yes i was in a number of long term relationships before i figured out such comprimise was only worth it to me eight to ten hours a day not 24, and 5 days a week not seven. So i gave it a go and know what its all about and its not my cup of tea. And yes a couple of those poeple were pretty easy to live with. I just much prefer to not worry about whats in that bag when i come through the door or what is gonna be said i about that box on the porch.

[Martin Wasner]

Inspired by Darcy's post (http://www.sawmillcreek.org/showthread.php?252292-Little-American-and-German-iron):


Buying equipment is just me trying to eliminate bottle necks in the process. I don't even bother telling much less explaining why I've got a new piece of equipment. So long as I'm in business, I'll never stop buying things if the capital is there to do so, and I have a place to put it.

There's always ways to improve output.



Darcy, what's your story? I'm a little lustful of that Kolle planer.

[Darcy Warner]

Darcy, what's your story? I'm a little lustful of that Kolle planer.


Half my time is spent doing architectural millwork. Parts and pieces for old houses mostly, porch parts, turnings, etc .
Just stuff that no one else wants or can do is usually my market. I am trying to move to just production work and forget home owners altogether.

The other half (beginning to creep well over half) is spent buying, rebuilding, repairing (on site and back to my shop) rebuilds for customers, selling, etc.

As time has went on, I learned that I like the machinery more than building stuff for people.

[Darcy Warner]

It's a Bauerle, from 1960.

[Dave Cav]

I can't believe no one has posted that over at OWWM.

Oh, wait. All the Significant Others at OWWM are already well past the "are you out of your mind" stage....

[Martin Wasner]

It's a Bauerle, from 1960.

I was looking at your YouTube channel, that's where I saw the Kolle

[Darcy Warner]

I was looking at your YouTube channel, that's where I saw the Kolle

That was a really sweet finish planer. I miss it, wouldn't mind having another.

[Chris Hachet]

Half my time is spent doing architectural millwork. Parts and pieces for old houses mostly, porch parts, turnings, etc .
Just stuff that no one else wants or can do is usually my market. I am trying to move to just production work and forget home owners altogether.

The other half (beginning to creep well over half) is spent buying, rebuilding, repairing (on site and back to my shop) rebuilds for customers, selling, etc.

As time has went on, I learned that I like the machinery more than building stuff for people.I am enjoying the quest for old ARN as a way to complete my shop quite enjoyable and addictive.