untimely death of a dear friend - hard to understand

[Mike Lassiter]

A 40 year old man died this past weekend who was 1 of 2 people I have known in my life that where as SOLID as a rock. His word meant something. He ALWAYS took the high ground, and stood up for what was right. I never saw or knew of a single time that he backed away from anything or anyone just because it would have been easier than what he knew was right and should be. He had complications from surgery and died. Literally overnight after surgery.
Much yet I don't know, but an autopsy is being done now.

He was a father to two girls of his own and a step dad to a teenage boy that he struggled to make grow up right and proper. Foster parents to 3 small kids. I had the privilege of he and I becoming very close and feel honored that he was my friend and I was his. When we first met he was my boss and we quickly became much more. He's irreplaceable to many that knew him.


And yet there are untold numbers of men still living that are at the opposite end of the scale of honor and so forth. His wife and I both talked briefly today when she called me to tell me about the funeral arrangements and wanting me to be a pallbearer for him. She told me she didn't really know how she felt. But, she said; "I am mad! I don't understand...." to which I interrupted her and said "why him, being the man he was when so many others deserve to not be here" "Exactly!" she replied


I am the real life Mr. Spoke. I try to understand the workings of things (mechanic in me), the how's and whys and this just don't make sense.
Don't really expect anyone to provide the answer I suppose, just needed to get it off my chest.


Thanks for listening.......

[Steve Schlumpf]

Mike - sorry to hear of the loss of your friend.

[Kent Adams]

I'm sorry for the loss of your friend and it being all of a sudden is hard. I hope someone says something as nice about me when I'm gone. You were obviously a good friend to him as well.

[Scott Shepherd]

Very sorry for your loss Mike.

[Dennis Peacock]

Mike,
So sorry for the loss of your friend. Prayers for the surviving family and friends.

[George Bokros]

Sorry for the loss of a friend and good person. The Lord has plans for him to bring more good. Deepest sympathy to the family he left behind.

[Ken Fitzgerald]

Sorry to hear of the loss of your friend! My thoughts and prayers to his friends and family.

[Moses Yoder]

I am very sorry for the loss of your friend. If I could have given my life for him to live I would have.

[Frederick Skelly]

I'm very sorry to hear about your friend. He sounds like a man I would like to have known.
Fred

[Jay Aubuchon]

Mike, I am sorry for this terrible loss.

[Bruce Page]

My condolences Mike. Sudden loss of life is tragic and difficult to understand. I know that your good friend had a good friend.

[Mel Fulks]

Your tribute to him will be seen and remembered by many and some will emulate his example. Sometimes it's difficult to be a pallbearer for a close friend. If you think you would be better off as a mourner with no duty in the service...decline. His family will understand.

[Evan Ryan]

I am sorry that you lost your friend.

[Rick Potter]

Real friends are hard to find. My condolences.

[Jebediah Eckert]

Condolences.

"enjoy every sandwich"

[Myk Rian]

It isn't a loss if you remember him, and all he stood for.

[Mike Lassiter]

I'm very sorry to hear about your friend. He sounds like a man I would like to have known.
Fred

He was that kind of man!

He told me of times with his father and mother before they passed away. He would show using his hands to motion how quick his mother would jerk the end off a wire handled fly swatter and give them all a whack when they deserved it. Stern parents that raised their kids to respect their elders, authority, and how to live right and do right. I know his parents had to be proud.

He was the kind of man I have tried to be myself and a model for many to follow.

[Mike Lassiter]

Your tribute to him will be seen and remembered by many and some will emulate his example. Sometimes it's difficult to be a pallbearer for a close friend. If you think you would be better off as a mourner with no duty in the service...decline. His family will understand.

I understand your remarks, but honestly to my way of looking at this - it is MY honor to be a pallbearer for him. It is the last thing I will every be able to do before he is laid to rest. A privilege to be ask to do it.

[Mike Lassiter]

It isn't a loss if you remember him, and all he stood for.

Thank you

There is loss even then. There would have been many more he could have influenced just by being himself and going about his daily life. He stood tall. Hard to envision I guess that non of you knew him; but he NEVER backed away from standing for right and just. His girls have been the center of his life and the greatest source of trouble due to divorce many years ago. Ex used them to hurt him every way she could. Daddy was firm and strict and didn't let them run wild like mom did. They chose her until child support ran out then she didn't want them with her anymore. Christmas before last was the only Christmas I recall him speaking of that they were with him. Then a few months later, he wouldn't let them act and live as mom had and they both disowned him.
My understanding is when he had to go to the emergency room last week the girls were called and neither one showed up. He died shortly afterwards. Don't know if they every came to see him before he passed or not. He would have died for either of them. Guess they will get to live with there selfishness the rest of their life's.

[Ian Moone]

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift to be savored - that's why its called "the present" - try to make the most of every day & stop to smell the roses.
Birth is a 100% guaranteed death sentence - non of us gets out of this game of life alive!
Non of us knows when our numbers up!
There is no explaining "life" other than to watch the cycles of nature. Everything has it's season - heck even the very mountains themselves become just grains of sand on the seashore given sufficient time.
We are no different. We are a part of the web of life. There more to being a man than knowing how to live well - knowing how and when to die well, is also part of the lessons we are hear to learn.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls lest, it toll for thee.
Sorry for your loss!.
Condolences to his family, friends & colleagues.

[Raymond Fries]

So sorry for your loss. The passing of time helps us accept our losses and heal our hearts. May all of the good memories help you on your journey.

My condolences to his family and friends.

[Bruce Wrenn]

Remember that he was "On loan from God, subject to recall at any time." Celebrate the life that he lived and live to show how he affected you. We never know the plans God has for us.

[Dave Ray]

Sorry for your loss, Mike. Take solace in the knowledge that God needs good men also

[Mike Henderson]

This may not be much consolation but I'm reminded of Hemingway's quote:

"The world breaks everyone and afterwards many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break, it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these, you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry."

I'm very sorry for your loss.

Mike

[Keith Westfall]

It's never easy. Good friends are hard to find. May you find peace and comfort in a difficult time...

[Mike Lassiter]

thank everyone for your words. I recieved a couple of pm's as well. Thank you too.
We laid Kevin to rest this afternoon. I spoke to Kevin's son several times and I am convinced Jerry knows Kevin loved him and was trying to mold him into a worthy young man. Everyone remembers Kevin for how he lived and his high code of conduct. Jerry and I had a couple of moments together that just reinforced my high regard for Kevin. I see a young man that has been saved from becoming a problem child and young adult. I felt rejoiced knowing the struggles Kevin had over the years wanting Jerry to "amount to something"; and see it come to be.
He left the world a better place.