PDA

View Full Version : How NOT to shake hands??



Larry Frank
12-03-2013, 9:04 PM
I know that this sounds kind of silly but......

I had surgery on my right hand back in September and been in a cast or splint since then. (the surgery was called four corner wrist fusion.)

I have now graduated to not needing the splint or brace except when doing heavier work. However, I really do not want to shake hands with it as I have a fear that someone will decide to show me how strong they are and really squeeze on my hand. I have gone through way to much to have something bad happen to it now.

How do I politely decline shaking hands? I would like to avoid having to explain why I do not want to shake hands every time someone sticks out their hand to shake.

Gordon Eyre
12-03-2013, 9:19 PM
Use your other hand and folks will soon get the idea.

Rich Engelhardt
12-03-2013, 10:24 PM
+1 to the other hand.

John Hays
12-03-2013, 10:39 PM
Yep, use your left hand... it confuses the heck out of them. ;)

They will also not have a tendency to play hydraulic press with their weak hand, either... unless they're a lefty. LOL

paul cottingham
12-03-2013, 10:57 PM
Left hand as well, or.....I hate to say it, but a loose, almost limp grip gives people the idea. My right hand is quite badly damaged, and I have to resort to these all the time. I'm a big guy, so some people think they have to engage in a strength war every time they shake hands with me.

Judson Green
12-03-2013, 11:31 PM
Ah could ya just mention that you've had recently had hand surgery?

Biff Johnson
12-03-2013, 11:46 PM
Don't use your left hand...that's awkward. Keep something in your hand, like a hat, when possible or keep the brace on. When you can't do those things then just explain! I had same situation after elbow surgery.

Jeff Erbele
12-04-2013, 3:07 AM
I know that this sounds kind of silly but......

I had surgery on my right hand....

How do I politely decline shaking hands? I would like to avoid having to explain why I do not want to shake hands every time someone sticks out their hand to shake.

I don't know if there is a good way to decline without explaining, even if briefly. Simply politely decline with, "I had surgery on my hand".

Quickly redirect and refocus, have them answering questions; how long are you in town, where do you work; something appropriate to the situation.

Shaking hands is a good way to spread the common cold.

If you like her, kiss her instead :)

Mike Cozad
12-04-2013, 6:21 AM
I have some severe UC/Crohn's disease that causes me to be on very strong immune system suppressants. I have become somewhat of a germaphobe after getting 2 additional life threatening illnesses brought on by the weak immune system. I have resorted to the fist bump with folks I know. They get it. When I meet someone new I struggle with this issue as well. Mine is a bit easier as I can shake hands and use hand sanitizer. However that comes across as rude. (At least I think it seems extremely rude) So I have a quick one liner about not shaking hands. Its what I could come up with to not get sick but not be a complete tool to people either. I know these are not exactly the same thing but similiar enough that I can understand where you're coming from....

Harold Burrell
12-04-2013, 8:00 AM
At church, I have to "shake hands" with everybody. What I have resorted to (especially during cold and flu season) is the fist bump. I initiate it...that saves from having to redirect a handshake offer.

Left hands are perfectly acceptable fist bumps. :)

Ole Anderson
12-04-2013, 9:58 AM
When I shake hands I somewhat try to match the grip of the other person in deference to possible hand problems. But I do have a lower limit, no one is going to get a "limp fish" hand shake from me. They are just plain creepy. But not uncommon to get a hand crusher that I simply haven't the strength to match. But I agree with the fist bump or left hand option in the case of hand injury, good idea.

Biff Johnson
12-04-2013, 10:11 AM
Fist bumps should be reserved for rappers and teenagers. Men shake hands, threat of the sniffles be damned.

David Weaver
12-04-2013, 10:37 AM
Left hand and "Sorry about that, I just had surgery on my right hand" if someone has an awkward response.

Bill Edwards(2)
12-04-2013, 11:08 AM
Absolutely, left hand.

There are too many thoughtless, moronic 'crushers' out there.

Harold Burrell
12-04-2013, 11:24 AM
Fist bumps should be reserved for rappers and teenagers. Men shake hands, threat of the sniffles be damned.

No...now the list would read, "Rappers, teenagers, Major League Baseball Players...and Pastors (who think they are any of the former)"...

Erik Loza
12-04-2013, 11:29 AM
Left hand and "Sorry about that, I just had surgery on my right hand" if someone has an awkward response.

I shake hands for a living and this is how I would do it... ^^^^.

Erik Loza
Minimax USA

Rick Potter
12-04-2013, 12:31 PM
I agree with most. Keep it simple, lift the right one and just say 'bad hand', and then offer the left.

Rick Potter

ken masoumi
12-04-2013, 12:59 PM
I would extend my left hand.
Or until you get better wear one of these:

276294

Jim Koepke
12-04-2013, 1:56 PM
There are too many thoughtless, moronic 'crushers' out there.

Ran into one of these once who was highly offended that my hand was quickly withdrawn when he started "the crush."

I told him off very loudly that I was the one who should be offended by some idiot who thought it was funny to cripple another person.

He grunted and left me alone after that.

I agree with just saying, "sorry, no offense, but my hand is broken." or some other response. Most people understand. The one's that do not are not people you want to be friends with anyway.

jtk

Erik Loza
12-04-2013, 2:26 PM
...There are too many thoughtless, moronic 'crushers' out there.

Ya, it can be awkward. Often, my wife will introduce me to female colleagues. I never want to give anyone a limp handshake but on the other hand, I don't want to squeeze someone's had so hard that it hurts. This might sound goofy but I actually squeeze with only my thumb. My hand is rigid and fingers tight, and I make sure to meet the other person's hand fully to the web of my thumb but I do not actually compress their hand. Mine just does not yield no matter how hard they squeeze. It's my good "all-purpose" handshake. It lets the crushers know that you have a firm grip but will not hurt someone who grips lightly. Anyway, it works for me.

All that being said, it drives me NUTS when people shake my four fingers rather than actually actually committing to an honest handshake. Always feel like saying, "Hey, can we try that again?", LOL.

Erik Loza
Minimax USA

Bill Edwards(2)
12-04-2013, 2:33 PM
Ran into one of these once who was highly offended that my hand was quickly withdrawn when he started "the crush."

I told him off very loudly that I was the one who should be offended by some idiot who thought it was funny to cripple another person.

He grunted and left me alone after that.

I agree with just saying, "sorry, no offense, but my hand is broken." or some other response. Most people understand. The one's that do not are not people you want to be friends with anyway.

jtk

Glad I'm not the only one who does that. :cool:

Kevin Bourque
12-04-2013, 3:38 PM
Give them a great big hug instead. This should keep them away for a few months.

Erik Loza
12-04-2013, 3:45 PM
Give them a great big hug instead. This should keep them away for a few months.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhChwe0ENvg

Mel Fulks
12-04-2013, 4:15 PM
I never assume a woman wants to shake hands ,and traditionally it's their option. When they extend a hand I grasp it and give caress with my left hand and gracefully release .

Larry Frank
12-04-2013, 8:16 PM
Thanks for all the ideas....the one that I like is the claw hand and I found one online for about $30.

I will be trying the left hand approach with a simple just had surgery explanation.

Tom Fischer
12-05-2013, 5:47 AM
Sen Bob Dole used to (probably still does) keep a pen in his right hand, just so nobody caught him by surprise.
Same situation, I think.

Frederick Skelly
12-05-2013, 6:59 AM
+1 to Judsons point. Id just tell them.

Harold Burrell
12-05-2013, 10:44 AM
Sen Bob Dole used to (probably still does) keep a pen in his right hand, just so nobody caught him by surprise.
Same situation, I think.

Personally...I use a large caliber handgun...








j/k ;)

Matt Marsh
12-05-2013, 4:04 PM
Do what Owen does right before he shakes Neil's hand.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dbgOACJpZg0

Stephen Tashiro
12-06-2013, 5:53 PM
How do I politely decline shaking hands?.

Try watching old Perry Mason episodes. For some reason, Mason rarely shakes hands with his male clients. He must use some body language that causes them not to offer their hand. When he does shake hands, it's usually an important element in the plot.

Dana Decker
12-06-2013, 6:58 PM
you could just pick your nose with your right hand or sneeze in it, either would get the point across:D

Dave Sheldrake
12-06-2013, 7:39 PM
Depends who it is really, the obvious pre-defined for Lodges but in general just a firm but friendly grasp works for me. There are circumstances when using your left hand or offering your left hand would not be good (on religious or sanitary grounds).

To me a handshake is a sign of mutual respect and future / existing friendship, at 6'3+ and 240lbs I don't get too many "crushers" do it twice :)

cheers

Dave