Umm, I blame George

[Chris Scimone]

OK, so all of this talk about the decline of Nicholson post thier move to Mexico must have taken effect on me. I was in Highland Woodworking today to use my 'one day only, one item only' coupon. After I had selected my item (Easy Wood Rougher), I was wandering around (mistake 1) waiting for my buddy to make his pick. Of course, I had sworn to my better half that I was only getting the 'One Tool I Could not Live Without... Today', so I was not paying too much attention to all the other goodies in the store.

I happen to pass by the files, and am bemoaning to my buddy how all the guys online are saying the new nicholsons aren't up to snuff. Right as I say this, I see the telltale 'Made in the USA' logo on the corner of a few files... I start to look at all of the stacks of files on the wall, and notice that theres a few of the 'Made in USA' versions at the back of every row. Something took ahold of me, and I proceed to basically dismantle thier wall display, and snarf up 14 NOS Nicholsons. Single cuts, Double Cuts, Round, you name it - everything I could find.

I come home and try to sneak past the presence of My Accountant, heading by the front door and making a beeline for the shop. This will be known as 'Mistake 2', in the history books. I hear a not-so-sweet 'sweetie?' come out the back door as I'm rounding the bend. I stop mid-flight, and turn to face my doom. The conversation I recall went something like this...

Her: How Was the Tool Store?
Me: OK.
Her: Did you just buy the one ... thingie?
Me: I just bought the one big thingie...
Her: hmmmm. What else did you buy?
Me: 14 Files.
Her: Why?
Me: Because George said the new ones were crap and I should buy the ones that were made in the US.
Her: Who is George?
Me: He is very wise in the way of files.
Her: hmmmm. Why do you need 14 files?
Me: ....To file things.

Things get a little hazy here, I think there were some questions along the line of whether or not Georges recommendation for jumping off a bridge would also be followed. In my infinite stupidity, I may have answered 'Is there a Oneway Lathe at the bottom?'

I plan to fix this whole mess, once allowed to re-enter my home. In the meantime, George if you get a call from an angry half German, half-Native American Lady with two twins yelling in the background, if you could just take this one for the team, I would much appreciate it.

[Ted Calver]

Nicely played Chris. :D:p

[Adam Cruea]

lol

Yes, I was actually laughing out loud when I read this, but only because I've been in similar predicaments.

This is why SWMBO does not allow me to go to tool stores alone anymore. Though she has made the mistake of telling me when we go to Maine next year she wants to let me go to Lie-Nielsen. :D

[george wilson]

I take full responsibility.

[Gary Herrmann]

Think about this one, George.

Half German, Half Native American. With twins.


Chris, next time tell her that a file thingie is much cheaper than the one big thingie. Then be quiet and keep heading downstairs.

[Jim Neeley]

I dunno, Gary... I've always believed that when you put your foot in your mouth, stop talking. Once you get past the knee it gets painful!! DAMHIK!!

Seriously though I had a similar experience when I went into my local toy store for a pneumatic nailer for a HD rolling wood storage rack I was building and ran into the Nicolson display on an endcap. I didn't end up with 14 files but did get 4 or 5, including some large ones I'd been looking for.

George, you're a bad influence here.. and be PROUD of it!! :D

[Jim Koepke]

My wife got mad at me recently and complained about me spending money on planes. The last one I bought was a bit rough with its lateral lever snapped off of the frog. It didn't seem to resister for her that it was a #8 that only put me out $5.40 with tax.

Maybe I should start blaming someone else.

jtk

[Ron Bontz]

LOL, Chris, you should have had me send the saws to a different address. Hide them for a while and then one day say, " Oh, I have had those for a long time" Did you remember to say there was a great discount sale on those files? Poor grasshopper. One must learn the ways of the woodworker. :)

[Brent VanFossen]

LOL.

The trick for me is to always be building or planning to build something for my wife. Those files should have been explained as necessary for the bookshelf/cabinet/jewelry box/drawer repair you're working on for her.

My wife is no fool, and she understands the importance of good tools.

[Derek Cohen]

Chris, you should just do what I have always done ... buy them for your wife. Then borrow them as needed. My wife has an assortment of handplanes and windsurfers and ... oh all sorts of things she owns but does not use. I'm really very thoughtful. :)

Regards from Perth

Derek

[Jessica Pierce-LaRose]

I'm starting to wonder if I should be worried that my wife *doesn't* mind at all when I come home with more tools.

I've also been picking up the American made Nicholsons when I see them; wish I would stumble upon some half rounds or rounds, though.

[lowell holmes]

I think most of our wives tolerate our pastime because they know where to find us when they need to. The shop is more convenient than the golf course.

Mine sometimes shakes her head, but never complains. Of course I didn't complain when she bought her sewing machine that is computer contrilled and does quilting and embroidy work. :)

[Chris Parks]

You have got to use psychology when it comes to dealing with tools or workshop expenditure. It goes something like this,

HER: how much will it cost?

YOU: Think of a number and double it

HER: Goes nuts and starts yelling

YOU: Dear, I will try and keep it down as much as I can knowing full well that you were never going to spend that much anyway.

You then bring it home and declare you found a bargain for half price and she is happy as women love a bargain.

[Ethan Liou]

Chris, I like your idea. :D

[george wilson]

Yes,I had an apprentice years ago who worked in the Musical Instrument Maker's Shop. He kept "buying" things for his wife. He bought her a lute(he was a classical guitarist,she played nothing). Then,he bought her a percussion black powder pistol repro. I made a case for it. I'm sure she never used either!!

[Jim Matthews]

I take full responsibility.

Is there a legal term for this transgression?

If the victim is complicit, who's really to blame?

My wife has a button that reads, "Will trade husband's tools for Qiviut (http://windyvalleymuskox.net/qiviut.html)."
I fully expect to come home one day to find the door locked and a herd of Alpacas decamped in my shop...

[Jim Matthews]

Then,he bought her a percussion black powder pistol repro.

Never give ammunition to someone that might use it against you...

[Trevor Walsh]

Chris excellent conversation, and the kind of thing to be proud of. We never know when steals like that will ever come around again. I'd rather hoard the good stuff then some day lament the passing.

I may stop by the one good hardware store today and look for a trove of #4 cut rifflers. Lets see what I can get.

[george wilson]

Some of you are marrying the wrong type women!! I bought 77 files last week,no remarks at all. They are NOS Swiss filing machine files. I have a wife who is also a craftsman,so she's been bred right!!:)

[Jeff Wittrock]

Maybe I'm just the odd man out here. My wife is always encouraging me to buy the tools I want!
My wife is far more intelligent than I am and runs circles around me with her logic, but even I can see her motives in this regard.
I know that as soon as I bring home a new toy, the flood gates will open and she will be on the bay in seconds bidding on a coach purse. :)

[John Coloccia]

Let's get serious here for one second. Why only 14 files?

[Kent A Bathurst]

Let's get serious here for one second. Why only 14 files?


Even more serious: May I assume that you cleaned out their inventory of USA rasps? :mad: :mad:


;)

[Gary Herrmann]

George, I have to agree. My wife carves. I rarely get any flack about hand tools.

[george wilson]

My wife HAD bought some $200.00 JEANS from Anthropologie a few weeks ago. She gets her perks!!

[Chris Parks]

In reality my wife has never questioned my expenditure even in tough times and I must admit now those times are past tense. A recent example was I was doing a job and lamenting I did not have a Fein Multimaster to do it properly, quick as a flash she said go and buy one. It was her craft room I was working in and she could see the advantages attached to me getting the job finished.

[Greg Portland]

You have got to use psychology when it comes to dealing with tools or workshop expenditure. It goes something like this,

HER: how much will it cost?

YOU: Think of a number and double it

HER: Goes nuts and starts yelling

YOU: Dear, I will try and keep it down as much as I can knowing full well that you were never going to spend that much anyway.

You then bring it home and declare you found a bargain for half price and she is happy as women love a bargain.
Lower expectations and then slightly exceed them... the key to a happy marriage IMO ;).

[Jim Matthews]

Let's get serious here for one second. Why only 14 files?

I keep forgetting how funny you can be.
Now, I'm sponging coffee of my keyboard.
Again.

[Jim Matthews]

My wife HAD bought some $200.00 JEANS from Anthropologie a few weeks ago. She gets her perks!!

Pictures, or it didn't happen.

[Bill Bukovec]

There's a radio host in the Twin Cities by the name of Joe Soucheray. The show is called "Garage Logic".

He invented the "48 Hour rule" :

Length of time available for a spouse or live-in mate to notice a newly purchased item before the purchaser can claim that the item has been there forever. The item must be conspiculously placed, and cannot be hidden. Good Luck!

So all you need to do is hide it for two days.

Good Luck,

Bill

[Ryan Baker]

The Wilson effect strikes again. I just cleaned out the local blue box, where I found some remaining USA files in the back of the rack. Yet another store down. It's just like the Schwartz effect, where every tool mentioned goes out of stock. Nicholson is probably wondering about the recent spike in sales. Unfortunately they probably attribute it to the new manufacturing, not old stock.

[george wilson]

Yes,NOW the pencil pushers will have the incentive to produce MORE CRAP!!!! Wonder WHEN they will discover that no informed person wants their new files. The key word is INFORMED.

[daniel lane]

Pictures, or it didn't happen.

I see what you did there...

[Dan Carroll]

Is there a legal term for this transgression?

If the victim is complicit, who's really to blame?

My wife has a button that reads, "Will trade husband's tools for Qiviut (http://windyvalleymuskox.net/qiviut.html)."
I fully expect to come home one day to find the door locked and a herd of Alpacas decamped in my shop...

" 'Accessory after the fact', one who knowling a felony to have been committed by another, recieves, relieves comforts or assists the felon, in order to enable him to escape from punishment...." Blacks Law Dictionary. We couild all be in trouble with this one...

[Trevor Walsh]

Any chance they will let us keep the files in the cell with us? Not to break out, but to you know look at?

[John A. Callaway]

" He is very wise in the way of files. "

Absolutely the best part of the story. That was a solid answer.