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Brian Kent
04-01-2012, 11:33 AM
In my career, this is the busiest week. 15 church services in 8 days. I try to prepare in every way, including being as healthy and creative and relaxed as possible.

On Thursday I turned some Padauk. I turned the first part without a respirator, then put it on for final steps and sanding. Too late.
The fine little sawdust particles had taken up residence in the pores on the top of my nose.

The next morning I woke up with BRNS - "Big Red Nose Syndrome".

It isn't a pretty sight, folks. My next service is 90 minutes away. I will be trying my best to impart spiritual truth. They will be thinking, "Where did he get that gigantic red honker?" I often hope people will remember my sermons. Now I am afraid they will.

In keeping with the season, we each have our cross to bear. Theirs will be trying to concentrate on the sermon without laughter that explodes through their noses. And when one blows, they all blow. I can picture the tech savvy people now, sneaking pictures on their cell phones and texting to their friends. Watch for it on you tube. Pray for me.

Brian, that pastor who had BRNS on Holy Week.

Brian Kent
04-01-2012, 2:28 PM
I made it through one service with no obvious stares, comments, or burst of laughter. Thankfully, it is about 4 shades more normal than when I first posted.

Now what is really surprising is that I am on Sawmill Creek between church services. :p

Jim Matthews
04-01-2012, 4:10 PM
We're handing out the (This is what you do next...) cards next week.

That's when we see most of our congregation that has been absent since Christmas.
We're politely reminding people that the Mass already has a text and the management doesn't tweet, either.

Brian Kent
04-01-2012, 4:36 PM
We're handing out the (This is what you do next...) cards next week.

That's when we see most of our congregation that has been absent since Christmas.
We're politely reminding people that the Mass already has a text and the management doesn't tweet, either.

And why are churches only decorated in Poinsettias or Easter Lilies? Couldn't they get a little more variety?

Jim Matthews
04-01-2012, 8:13 PM
My kids think more would come if the Man in a Dress gave out Oreos instead of crackers...

Brian Kent
04-01-2012, 9:16 PM
Jim, I'll take that idea to the network of committees for consideration. If we are serving oreos and milk instead of crackers and grape juice, can we sing "Sweet little Jesus Boy"?

ray hampton
04-01-2012, 9:32 PM
And why are churches only decorated in Poinsettias or Easter Lilies? Couldn't they get a little more variety?

If you are not happy with the flowers then talk to the pastor about a different florist

Brian Elfert
04-02-2012, 12:22 AM
It isn't the florist deciding what flowers get placed in the church. Churches tend to very tradition bound and do the same thing year after year unless someone questions it. Unless a church is quite small there is probably some committee choosing how to decorate the church with the pastor's blessing.

Brian Kent
04-02-2012, 1:13 AM
Sorry, the joke is that if people only see Easter Lilies and Christmas Poinsettias, it means they only come to church on Easter and Christmas. :o
The other 50 Sundays we have every other kind of floral display.

Brian Elfert
04-02-2012, 8:44 AM
I know the church I attend has had to hold additional Christmas and Easter services in the school gym to handle the crowds. The school gym used to have a sanctuary and stained glass windows as was the church for a few years. Attendance is down overall so they don't hold as many extra services now.

ray hampton
04-02-2012, 2:54 PM
Sorry, the joke is that if people only see Easter Lilies and Christmas Poinsettias, it means they only come to church on Easter and Christmas. :o
The other 50 Sundays we have every other kind of floral display.

what do you think about Lilies every week to remind everyone of Easter

Rod Sheridan
04-02-2012, 3:33 PM
Brian, it's been at least 40 years since I've been to a church service, however based upon your great sense of humour and outlook on life, I'd probably enjoy going to one of your services.............Regards, Rod.

Brian Kent
04-02-2012, 3:50 PM
Brian, it's been at least 40 years since I've been to a church service, however based upon your great sense of humour and outlook on life, I'd probably enjoy going to one of your services.............Regards, Rod.

Rod, I just checked Google Maps and Toronto is only 2,600 miles away. C'mon over!

Brian Kent
04-02-2012, 3:51 PM
what do you think about Lilies every week to remind everyone of Easter

I think it is the Orthodox Church that coined the phrase "Every Sunday is a Mini Easter".

Rod Sheridan
04-02-2012, 5:39 PM
Brian, if I'm ever in your neck of the woods, I'll visit..........Rod.

Larry Klaaren
04-02-2012, 6:48 PM
there is probably some committee choosing how to decorate the church with the pastor's blessing.


I think you left out the word "out" after "with". That's the way it is in most traditional churches.