View Full Version : The Woodworker's Duck - Humor

Jim Becker
01-30-2005, 11:22 AM
A Woodworker took his old duck to the Veterinarian, concerned because the duck wouldn't eat. The Vet explained to the man that as ducks age their upper bills grow down over their lower bills, and make it difficult for the animal to pick up it's food.

"What you need to do is gently file the upper bill down, even with the lower bill. But you must be extra careful because the duck's nostrils are located in the upper bill and if you file down too far, when the duck takes a drink of water it'll drown."

The man goes about his business and about a week later the Vet runs into his

"Well, how is that duck of yours?" the Vet inquires.

"He's dead." declared the heartbroken man.

"I told you not to file his upper bill down too far! He took a drink of water and drowned didn't he?" insisted the Vet.

"No." lamented the man. "I think he was dead before I took him out of the vise."

Stefan Antwarg
01-30-2005, 3:02 PM


Rob Bourgeois
01-30-2005, 3:27 PM
I sure hope he took some hickory/pecan shavings and smoked that duck for a gumbo. ;) Sorry its cold today and I wish I had some smoked duck and sausage gumbo.

Daniel Rabinovitz
01-30-2005, 3:32 PM
I just quacked up - - - - -

Lou Morrissette
01-30-2005, 10:26 PM

Best laugh I've had in a while.:D :D Thanks.


Mark Singer
01-30-2005, 11:21 PM
Thanks Jim,

I won't try it on Tweety! He is tough...very tough!

Tim Morton
01-31-2005, 7:19 AM
nice !! :D :D

Dennis Peacock
01-31-2005, 9:13 AM
That's just too funny. :D I can relate to that as I have 7 wild...well, now tame Mallard ducks that live here with us about 12 months a year now.