Craig D Peltier
02-21-2011, 10:23 AM
How the Internet really started
- a revelation with an Incredibly Big Message (IBM)....
In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of
Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot. And
Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed,
she was often called Amazon Dot Com.
One day she said unto Abraham: "Why dost thou travel so far from town
to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy
tent?"
Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short
of a camel load, but simply said: "How, dear?"
Dot replied: "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between
to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply
telling you who hath the best price. And the sale can be made on the
drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with
the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success.
Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever
having to move from his tent.
To prevent neighbouring countries from overhearing what the drums were
saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It
was called Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a
language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The People (HTTP)
But this success did arouse envy. A man named Maccabia did secrete
himself inside Abraham's drum and began to siphon off some of
Abraham's business. But he was soon discovered, arrested and
prosecuted for insider trading.
And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy
horsefly take to camel dung.
They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or
NERDS.
And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the
deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were
going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who
bought off every drum maker in the land. And indeed did insist on
drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads
and drumsticks.
And Dot did say: "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken
over by others." And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel , or
eBay as it came to be known. He said: "We need a name that reflects
what we are." And Dot replied: "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner
Operators."
"YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they named it
YAHOO Dot Com.
Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic
Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to
locate things around the countryside. It soon became known as God's
Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE)
And that is how it all began. Truly! (All this time you thought it was
Al Gore)
- a revelation with an Incredibly Big Message (IBM)....
In ancient Israel , it came to pass that a trader by the name of
Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot. And
Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed,
she was often called Amazon Dot Com.
One day she said unto Abraham: "Why dost thou travel so far from town
to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy
tent?"
Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short
of a camel load, but simply said: "How, dear?"
Dot replied: "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between
to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply
telling you who hath the best price. And the sale can be made on the
drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."
Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with
the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success.
Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever
having to move from his tent.
To prevent neighbouring countries from overhearing what the drums were
saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It
was called Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a
language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The People (HTTP)
But this success did arouse envy. A man named Maccabia did secrete
himself inside Abraham's drum and began to siphon off some of
Abraham's business. But he was soon discovered, arrested and
prosecuted for insider trading.
And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy
horsefly take to camel dung.
They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or
NERDS.
And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the
deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were
going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who
bought off every drum maker in the land. And indeed did insist on
drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads
and drumsticks.
And Dot did say: "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken
over by others." And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel , or
eBay as it came to be known. He said: "We need a name that reflects
what we are." And Dot replied: "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner
Operators."
"YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they named it
YAHOO Dot Com.
Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic
Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to
locate things around the countryside. It soon became known as God's
Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE)
And that is how it all began. Truly! (All this time you thought it was
Al Gore)