Clear finish options

[Stephen Shapinsky]

I have a thick-top red oak dining table ready for glue up. In discussing finish options w LOML, she makes it clear: she prefers the appearance of the wood to change as little as possible.
She dislikes the amber effects of finishes such as oil poly or teak oil.

I am hoping for advice on finishes that do the least to change the appearance while still offering protection. We have a 9-month old whose favorite pastimes include banging and spilling, so this top will see some rough duty. I don't expect any finish be bulletproof, but obviously stain protection is important. the table is of a large, simple design, and it doesn't have to appear flawless, just not ruined.

Specific questions:
-is there such a finish?
-waterborne poly seems like an obvious choice, but I used a minwax version 9 years ago or so and it doesn't seem super tough. can anyone rec a brand? rockler pushes the general finishes EF high performance. experiences?
-grain filling: will a clear grain filler look strange or plasticky in this circumstance?

Any advice is appreciated. I should note that I do not have the capability to spray the finish.

[glenn bradley]

I would run a few samples to make sure LOYL is thinking about the right thing. Red oak in its natural state is pretty pale and lacks depth. Just wanting to make sure . . . at the very least the color will change in so far as it will look wet. A quick wipe with some mineral spirits on a piece that you have put through your sanding protocol will give you the general idea.

Waterborne Poly is reported in bake-offs to be one of the 'clearest' finishes. If your previous try didn't last well I would double the number of coats. Target Coatings Ultima Spray Lacquer is highly regarded but is being displaced by a newer version, EM6000. Unfortunately, both are designed to be sprayed.

[Phil Phelps]

Whatever finish you choose, I'd invest in a table pad for serving.

[Julian Nicks]

I'd use catalyzed laquer for the top. It's extremely durable, and won't turn yellow like oil based poly.

[Prashun Patel]

You should contact Target Coatings. or Jeff Jewitt @ Homestead Finishing. They can recommend a finish. I've used Target USL (waterbased lacquer) which does not appear to yellow. It's debatable whether it's appropriate for a dining table (although I gotta say I have Stickley reproduction table that's lacquered and it's lived well through 2 very poundy kids.

They have a waterbased varnish which might suit yr needs.