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Tony Sade
07-26-2004, 1:35 PM
My sixteen year old has made it clear that I'm no longer welcome on shopping trips for clothes (or anything else, for that matter) and I'm trying to figure out the best way to fund his purchases. I could hand over cash, which I'm reluctant to do for all the obvious reasons, or deposit money in his newly-opened checking account.

I prefer credit card purchases where possible because of the ability to have the credit card company mediate disputes with merchants. I'm not going to get him his own card, but I'm wondering if it is still possible to hand him my card for purchases. I've been asked my a number of merchants for an ID to confirm my identity, so I'm wondering if this will prevent him from using my card.

There were no cc's when I grew up except gas cards (showing my age here) so I have no personal experience with this issue. Anyone have any thoughts? Thanks,

Jim Becker
07-26-2004, 1:56 PM
Some of the credit card companies can provide an "associated" card for your account with specific spending limits...just for young folks like this. Talk to your credit card provider to see what they offer for family members and "student" use. The other option is to have him use a debit card on his own checking account...forces budgeting and all that!

Donnie Raines
07-26-2004, 2:36 PM
My parents would buy a gift certificate to a store of my choosing. I would hit store and get what I needed....nothing more nothing less. I was fully aware that I could blow the money on other stuff in the store...but I was also fully aware that I could not show up to school naked either. It seemed like a good "program" to me....

Rob Russell
07-26-2004, 3:24 PM
There are also "prepaid" charge cards which work as debit cards and therefore automatically have a set spending limit. You can recharge them by depositing more money. Drawback to those is you give them your money upfront.

Question - why not get him his own cc? You could setup a joint acct, card in his name, low limit. If the card gets lost, not much damage can be done and it doesn't expose your (higher limit) account. It's one way to start building a credit rating for him.

Dennis Peacock
07-26-2004, 4:00 PM
Good topic and thread here. I'm interested to find out what the overall consensus is on this as I will be faced with this in just a very short few years.

Michael Cody
07-26-2004, 5:14 PM
Debit Card -- trying to wean myself off CC's so I didn't see the need to get my 16 year old hooked. We setup a joint account @ the bank with debit card for him. I just put the money in the account (or he does) and he's got the use of it up to the money amount in the account. Works just like CC but with very little of the risk. It also lets him purchase on Ebay & the internet if he wishes since it works like CC. Also teaches him how to budget and reconcile ... figured that wasn't a bad idea either. Since makes 2-300$ a week mowing lawns and doing odd jobs including cleaning kennels at the local pet rescue facility, he's got a ready source of cash to fund his endevours.

The prepaid things like Amex Gift cards and other are an ok solution too. Also around here it's Meijer/WallyWorld/Target, etc.. gift cards.

Joe Tonich
07-26-2004, 9:40 PM
Tony,

Thank God I still have 5yrs. to go before I have that battle. I don't know how I'll handle it but it will probably be the way MY parents handled it. If you have a job, buy what you want (as long as it's reasonable). If I'M paying, you get some input but you'll end up with what I get you. I learned early that you have to work for what you want, nobody is going to hand it to you.

Joe - still :confused: :confused: about raising kids but trying my best.

Gary Whitt
07-27-2004, 8:01 AM
Gift certificates.

You as a parent are responsible for your children until they turn 18.
If a credit card or debit card are lost or mis-used, it comes back on you.

When they turn 18, they can get their own credit established in their own name.

Tony Sade
07-27-2004, 8:48 AM
I appreciate all the suggestions. I've decided to deposit the money in his checking account and allow him to either use his checks or his debit card. I'm not a big fan of debit cards because they don't offer the same type of fraud protection that federal law mandates for credit cards-maximum liability of $50 if the card is lost or stolen and the loss is promptly reported. Theoretically, at least, someone could find the debit card or get the account number and empty an account rather quickly without any recourse for the ripped off party. Our bank offers its own fraud guarantee-no liability for fraudulent transactions. My "comfort level" with this guarantee is sufficient. My credit card company doesn't offer an "associate" card as Jim suggested.

I'm trying to teach my kid, who, by the way, is a very responsible teenager, some basic money management skills, so he doesn't get into the kinds of trouble some of you have mentioned. Simply throwing cash at him then kicking him out the door when he is [or I am ;)] ready, just doesn't seem like a good idea. He is earning his own money this summer working for a guy who is gutting a building that's going to be rehabbed for professional offices, but his academic load during the year (all AP courses in a very rigorous honors program,together with his sports participation-cross country, basketball, and baseball, means he won't have much time for paid employment. That means I'm going to be picking up the freight for some of his necessities. My plan is to have him work up a budget for his regular expenses, then make my contribution on a monthly basis and have him live with the consequences of his spending decisions.

As for his clothing and personal grooming choices, he's a passionate conformist (of a decidedly conservative bent) who wouldn't dream of going off the deep end into some type of bizarre fashion statement. His idea of a wild hair is to leave his tee-shirts not tucked in!

He's a great kid of whom I expect big things, and whom I obviously love to death. [His 11 year old brother, who, while also smarter than I am, is the biggest pain in the ass I've ever met ;)] is another story.] If only I could just get him to stop hanging out with Republicans. :D

Thanks again for all your ideas. Cheers,

Gary Whitt
07-28-2004, 9:25 AM
Sounds like a good, responsible kid.
Maybe the younger one will observe his older brother's habits and realize that it is easier to pull a chain than to push one....

Donnie Raines
07-29-2004, 9:23 AM
I appreciate all the suggestions. I've decided to deposit the money in his checking account and allow him to either use his checks or his debit card. I'm not a big fan of debit cards because they don't offer the same type of fraud protection that federal law mandates for credit cards-maximum liability of $50 if the card is lost or stolen and the loss is promptly reported. Theoretically, at least, someone could find the debit card or get the account number and empty an account rather quickly without any recourse for the ripped off party. Our bank offers its own fraud guarantee-no liability for fraudulent transactions. My "comfort level" with this guarantee is sufficient. My credit card company doesn't offer an "associate" card as Jim suggested.

I'm trying to teach my kid, who, by the way, is a very responsible teenager, some basic money management skills, so he doesn't get into the kinds of trouble some of you have mentioned. Simply throwing cash at him then kicking him out the door when he is [or I am ;)] ready, just doesn't seem like a good idea. He is earning his own money this summer working for a guy who is gutting a building that's going to be rehabbed for professional offices, but his academic load during the year (all AP courses in a very rigorous honors program,together with his sports participation-cross country, basketball, and baseball, means he won't have much time for paid employment. That means I'm going to be picking up the freight for some of his necessities. My plan is to have him work up a budget for his regular expenses, then make my contribution on a monthly basis and have him live with the consequences of his spending decisions.

As for his clothing and personal grooming choices, he's a passionate conformist (of a decidedly conservative bent) who wouldn't dream of going off the deep end into some type of bizarre fashion statement. His idea of a wild hair is to leave his tee-shirts not tucked in!

He's a great kid of whom I expect big things, and whom I obviously love to death. [His 11 year old brother, who, while also smarter than I am, is the biggest pain in the ass I've ever met ;)] is another story.] If only I could just get him to stop hanging out with Republicans. :D

Thanks again for all your ideas. Cheers,
Sounds like the younger lad is hanging with the right crowd to me.... :D